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Justin Richards Experiences

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 These long nights are killing me. No food-- No water-- little ammo... Can't last much longer. I need help, I can't find my group. This is how my day went... I woke up this morning and I ate rock soup. It's a little gross and unhealthy but I needed something to eat. To make rock soup, you get some water boiling and then you put some rocks in it, preferably rocks with some grub and bugs to get the protein going. You don't actually eat the rocks, the rocks just flavors the water. After my five star breakfast I just went out in search of assistance. Didn't find much-- I know I'm not the only one left, I know I can't be. This world is left untouched while I roam these roads and forests with these undead bastards. I miss my family. I miss my group. The Black Roses is all I got and I'm not sure if any of them are still alive. I believe there's 8 of us right now. Cullen Shae @XxGrAipYyxX is our leader, but like the rest of the Black Roses, I can't find him. May god bless my soul.

 The lives we live, we can't call these lives. This is hell. I don't think we're alive. I think we're all dead, just sent to this lousy fucking place they call a world. I remember when I first joined the Black Roses. Some Irish idiot I found-- Well I shouldn't say that-- He saved my life.. We camped together for a few days before he told me about the Hellcats or whatever the hell their group was called. I had to think about. I never thought of being in a mercenary group. Bunch of assholes are what they were! I didn't want to be but he saved my life and he was my best chance of survival. That was the smartest decision I've ever made… These people. They're my family, I could not survive without them-- But here I find myself alone and cold. Shivering and hungry I lie here with cuts in my arm, not knowing if its from a biter or from me running into something like the dumbass I am.

  No wonder why I’m alone, I’m useless. I'm a damn paramedic and business graduate. I’ve been having nightmares lately.. A guy I used to know, his name is ford @The Ford. I keep seeing him just leaving me. Running through the woods to get away from me. I thought we were family. I can't let that happen again. I need to shelter myself. Can't let anyone in *Scribbles out* What the hell am I saying. If I isolate myself I'm going to end up putting my gun in my mouth and pulling the trigger. I’ve had enough of writing for the night. There's too much on my fucking mind. I just have to express myself.. Maybe a poem will help.


Once when I was little

 I was happy and carefree.

    I used to run around laughing

    Until it was time for tea.


    I used to play games

     And smile all the time.

      I used to feel on top of the world.

        I used to feel fine.


        It's amazing how things change

         When people let you down.

          And how that once happy face

           Turns into a solemn frown.


            You search and search

             For someone who cares,

              Anyone who understands,

               Anyone who dares.


                 Loneliness, it hurts.

                  It kills you deep inside.

                   It makes you feel empty.

                    It stops you in your stride.


                     You cry yourself to sleep,

                       Hugging your pillow tight,

                          Wishing for someone

                            To hold you through the night.


                              Once when I was little

                                I was happy and carefree.

                                  Now my life's full of sadness,

                                   Pain and misery.


                                      Once when I was little

                                        I was never on my own.

                                          But now I pray at night

                                                               I wish I wasn't alone.





Edited by Frostyy

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