Jump to content
Server time (UTC): 2019-11-22, 06:28
Sign in to follow this  
Papa Krieg

Dolg

Recommended Posts

 

 

 RcAUDAR.png

      Duty_Sacrafice_Vigelence.png 

Spoiler

 

 

History_of_Dolg.png

Spoiler
 
 
Pre-Outbreak-
 
Долг (Dolg) was founded in early 2002 as a Private Military Company by Dragomir Bagrov. Bagrov served in the Chernarussian Defense Force following the fall of the Soviet Union in 1991. He enlisted as a private and worked his way through the ranks until 2001. He quickly became tired of the “lethargy” of CDF and resigned from his position. Immediately following his resignation he started to require resources to build a military of his own. By early 2002 he gained such resources and manpower to create his PMC “Dolg”. He bought an office building in Chernogorsk and set up his new headquarters. Dolg was a medium sized Private Military Company that hired many ex-military personnel, ex- police officers, civilians with security training, and they would even train civilians with no experience.
 
Dolg fulfilled a large amount of civilian contracts such as intermittent contracts with The Rattray Corporation. These contracts would usually entail providing security for large shipments of firearms and narcotics. Dolg also contracted for a medical company guarding their medical materials while they were in transport. From time to time Dolg would also take on contracts that involved personnel protection. These contracts usually involved providing security to civilians who were either leaving or entering the country and escorting them from one place to another. Dolg remained doing this contracts through the Chernarussian Civil War and up until the outbreak began.
 
 
Early days of the Outbreak-
 
When the outbreak hit in 2017 Dolg contractors were in the Dolg Headquarters at Chernarus. The notable contractors who were on sight were Dragomir Bagrov, Nikolai Bagrov, and Vasiliy Sokolov. The infection hit hard. The headquarters of Dolg was overrun by the infected leaving many contractors dead. A quote from one contractor states “ The Dolg Headquarters was in shambles, the floors were covered in blood and bullet casings and the building was going up in flames when we had to evacuate.” Dolgs escape from Chernogorsk was short lived. The streets of Cherno were overwhelmed with chaos. Civilians running from the infected, people looting stores it was pure pandemonium. The streets were too crowded and the Dolg Motorcade was halted on one of the main streets due to a crashed bus. When the contractors left their vehicles they were met with the screams of the infected. Heavy combat ensued and it resulted in heavy Dolg casualties and forced a retreat. Only three contractors survived this melee: Vasiliy Sokolov, Nikolai and Dragomir Bagrov. The men retreated into the forest north of the Chernogorsk leaving behind their Headquarters, their fellow contractors, and everything they have built behind.
 
 
Five months later-
 
The three man were running desperately low on medical supplies and decided to leave their forest encampment. Since they knew Chernarus like the back of their hands they decided to head to Elektrozavodsk for its hospital. As the men approached the city they noticed the streets were extremely quiet. The only thing that could be heard was this whistle of the wind through the empty streets. When they approached the hospital all of the windows appeared to smashed or shattered, The men still decided to scavenge through the building for anything they could find. Everything was going fine until they heard shouting coming from one of the upper floors.
 
As they made there way up the stairwell they saw three survivors being held at gunpoint by another group of three bandits. The Dolg contractors quickly realizing that the situation was about to turn ugly engaged in a firefight with the bandits. Having the advantage of surprise they took down two of the bandits and the third scrambled towards the survivors and took one hostage holding his makarov to one of their heads. The Dolg contractors now standing in the hallway with their rifles aimed on the one bandit and hostage. They tried to de-escalate the situation but it seemed like they were getting nowhere. Eventually the bandit said “ You killed two of my brothers just let me leave and I won’t ever bother you guys again. The Dolg contractors agreed and let the bandit leave as long he let go of the hostage. As the bandit descended the stairwell and left the main entrance of the hospital one of the contractors broke open the window from the floor they were on and lined up a shot on the bandit. The next second the only thing that was heard was a single discharge from a rifle and a loud thump from outside. The Dolg contractors then went to the survivors and asked them how they were and they only exchanged a few words. At that moment the Dolg contractors decided that they would not stand for such obscenity. They decided that Dolg will once re-emerge as a force for the Survivors of Chernarus. They will stand to protect the innocent and the weak from the horrors of the new Chernarus such as lawlessness, anarchy, and banditry.
 

Members.png

Diplomacy.png

Untitled-2.png

None

Neutral-2.png

Mostly everyone

Enemies-2.png

Bandits,Anarchists,Slavers 

 

IC_Goals-2.png

Spoiler

1)Make ourselves known throughout the land by fulfilling contracts or by a show of force if necessary

2)Help the people of Chernarus by providing them protection against groups or individuals that would take advantage of them

3)Establish a Headquarters to provide a base of operations and recruit like minded individuals and train them with military professionalism

4)Cleanse Chernarus of Infection by either liberating areas compromised by the infected or find any surviving scientists/doctors that will help combat the infection

5)Find a radio transmitter,fix it and start broadcasting recruitment propaganda and local news

 

OOC_GOALS-2.png

Spoiler

1)Create a fun environment for everyone in our group

2)Provide good RP to everyone

3)Create friendships between our members

4)Generally have fun

 

Recruitment-2.png

Recruitment will be in-game but if someone is really interested to join us send me a pm 

Edited by Papa Krieg

Share this post


Link to post
Spoiler

Duty.thumb.png.842a42ac0c934c0d8061ffbe16f5a8ea.png

Aside from the cheeky meme, looks great.

I'd probably change the name from Dolg to something else though, the whole Dolg + PMC feels a little too close of a resemblance. Especially when paired together with the goal of curing/ending the virus and generally cleansing the undead.

Just a little food for thought ;) 

Share this post


Link to post

Just some quick feedback;

  • Format this much better, it's too big and too much scroll work.
  • More original or more thought out goals because yours are currently what everyone else is trying to do.
  • Learn more about yourselves IC, we met you yesterday and you told us you were we Military group of concerned citizens who are here to help then told us we have 2 minutes to leave or else.
  • I'm not sure who it was yesterday but he kept pointing his gun at us and you kept asking us to leave, be careful. We understand some of your roster are new to the community but when we came across you guys it was very... blank. We met @THIRTYLEAF near the vyshnoye compound and we asked what he was doing there and he literally all he said was "I can't hear you" for twenty minutes before us telling him to fuck off because we tried to RP with him but his VOIP wasn't working or something but he could hear some things which was weird. The overall RP so far has been disappointing but you have got newer members to the community, i'd recommend some of them join the Mentor Program (Self advertisment am I rite?) as this may aid the overall RP received from you guys.

But on the other hand

  • Its nice to see a hero group (Or from what I can see)
  • @Papa Krieg your RP was good for the most part and you stood out as the leader, I would recommend your lads to have how they entered the company in their backstorys (I read through all of them and only a couple had it others just had stuff about all their family dying and nothing about Dolg).

From what I see this is a private company full of soldiers gone self proclaimed military. Interesting concept and i'm curious to see how this plays out IC.

Other than that good luck with the ground.

Edited by Galaxy

Share this post


Link to post

Graphics and visual theme remind me a lot of Solntsevskaya Bratva. I would perhaps try and get something more unique. Also, your text is far too large and your punctuation needs work. 

Your goals are extremely generic and flat. I would give then a bit of a harder goal. Like perhaps they want to discover more about ground zero and what caused the infection in the first place with the scientists they recruit. 

More of an official once over when I'm not at work. 

Share this post


Link to post

Feedback:

  • Too spaced out - please put the font and titles closer together
  • Graphics I don't mind - gives the aesthetic russian vibe
  • Some of the goals seem to be the same - finding a cure is also everyone's goal
  • Arts of war - is this hostile RP or legit training people?
  • Good roster

If you need help, feel free to PM me and I can help out on the whole spacing and such :) 

Share this post


Link to post
2 hours ago, Galaxy said:

Just some quick feedback;

  • Format this much better, it's too big and too much scroll work.
  • More original or more thought out goals because yours are currently what everyone else is trying to do.
  • Learn more about yourselves IC, we met you yesterday and you told us you were we Military group of concerned citizens who are here to help then told us we have 2 minutes to leave or else.
  • I'm not sure who it was yesterday but he kept pointing his gun at us and you kept asking us to leave, be careful. We understand some of your roster are new to the community but when we came across you guys it was very... blank. We met @THIRTYLEAF near the vyshnoye compound and we asked what he was doing there and he literally all he said was "I can't hear you" for twenty minutes before us telling him to fuck off because we tried to RP with him but his VOIP wasn't working or something but he could hear some things which was weird. The overall RP so far has been disappointing but you have got newer members to the community, i'd recommend some of them join the Mentor Program (Self advertisment am I rite?) as this may aid the overall RP received from you guys.

But on the other hand

  • Its nice to see a hero group (Or from what I can see)
  • @Papa Krieg your RP was good for the most part and you stood out as the leader, I would recommend your lads to have how they entered the company in their backstorys (I read through all of them and only a couple had it others just had stuff about all their family dying and nothing about Dolg).

From what I see this is a private company full of soldiers gone self proclaimed military. Interesting concept and i'm curious to see how this plays out IC.

Other than that good luck with the ground.

 

Thanks for the advice, We are currently working on creating more thought out goals, My back story does include Dolg but I am working on creating a more in depth one soon. During the interaction I actually was sitting on the roof just watching, I do agree however that our members do need to improve on their role-play styles and I will work with them to improve their back stories and to have them include their Dolg into their backstories.

1 hour ago, Taryn said:

Graphics and visual theme remind me a lot of Solntsevskaya Bratva. I would perhaps try and get something more unique. Also, your text is far too large and your punctuation needs work. 

Your goals are extremely generic and flat. I would give then a bit of a harder goal. Like perhaps they want to discover more about ground zero and what caused the infection in the first place with the scientists they recruit. 

More of an official once over when I'm not at work. 

 

Thank you for telling us what we need to have worked on, I believe Krieg and I have never actually heard of Solntsevskaya Bratva. We just liked the color scheme and since we were are Chernarussian based group I decided to use a Kremlin font style to give it more of the feel. I will work on the punctuation for the text and try to shorten it, I will also look towards creating a more driven set of goals. 

Edited by Mr.Goat

Share this post


Link to post
19 minutes ago, Faith said:

Feedback:

  • Too spaced out - please put the font and titles closer together
  • Graphics I don't mind - gives the aesthetic russian vibe
  • Some of the goals seem to be the same - finding a cure is also everyone's goal
  • Arts of war - is this hostile RP or legit training people?
  • Good roster

If you need help, feel free to PM me and I can help out on the whole spacing and such :) 

Thank you for the advice I am currently working through all of the suggestions that were given.

Share this post


Link to post

Your graphics have about a basketball court's length of space at each end of them. Cropping them will make this look much better and decrease some font sizes of the text.

Share this post


Link to post

Alrighty progression is being made where you are resizing the images (since it's taking up the space) and to change the font size. Example:

Spoiler

 

 "Duty,Sacrifice,Vigilance"  - Currently 48

"Duty,Sacrifice,Vigilance"  - This is a size 18

  "Duty,Sacrifice,Vigilance"  - This is size 20 font

 

We will work on it little by little :) 

Share this post


Link to post

oh god the format is horrible :D 

Good luck.

Share this post


Link to post
27 minutes ago, Santa said:

Your graphics have about a basketball court's length of space at each end of them. Cropping them will make this look much better and decrease some font sizes of the text.

Thanks for the advice, it is being improved right now.

12 minutes ago, Rory said:

oh god the format is horrible :D 

Good luck.

I discovered that, the format is being worked on right now.

Share this post


Link to post

The post has been updated, graphics and text are now resized, and most subsections have been placed into spoilers.

Share this post


Link to post

I've met you in game few days ago before my laptop died on me. You guys seem alright. Good luck lads. 

Share this post


Link to post
17 hours ago, Papa Krieg said:

1)Make ourselves known throughout the land

2)Help the people of Chernarus however we can

3)Offer security services to those who need it

4)Establish a Headquarters to provide a base of operations

5)Cleanse Chernarus of Infection

6)Recruit like minded individuals and train them with military professionalism 

7)To aid any surviving doctors and scientists to find a cure to help efficiently combat the virus

@Papa Krieg, I'm going to caveat off of what @Taryn said here, about your goals. She has some other feedback she'd like to address, and I'll leave that to her. They are very generic, and most any group you meet will have similar (if not identical) basic goals. This doesn't mean they're not good goals, but a bit of expansion would be splendid. I'll put a bit of a bug into your ear, and let's see if that can't help you iron things out, addressing each goal.

1. How do you plan to make yourselves known? Give specifics here.

2. How are you going to help the people of Chernarus? Are you going to just give out supplies? Are you going to provide protection on trade routes? How aware are your characters of the current geopolitical situation throughout the land?

3. See above about the geopolitical situation. Offering yourselves up for hire may lead to some undesired consequences, HOWEVER, I've seen it work before.

4. This should be a basic goal of any group, unless they're completely nomadic. It's not so important (as far as group approval goes) that you set up an HQ, but more what you intend to do with it. If your intent is just to provide a base of operations, I'd leave that one out.

5. Again, even most bandit groups want this at this point. If you want to keep this as a goal, elaborate in detail about how you're going to do it; who will you work with to do it, and how. @Taryn had a really good suggestion for that.

6. See above. This is another goal of pretty much every group.

7. This can be folded into goal #5.

What we want to see in your goals is uniqueness, my friend. Think of something fresh you want to bring to the table of RP. It can be difficult, I know, to come up with fresh ideas when so many groups already exist and have come and gone, but if you put your mind to it, I'm sure you can think of things.

Share this post


Link to post

Okay, so after having looked at everything and re-reading it to get a good grasp of what was written, here is my honest feedback and a few questions.

Straight off the bat, the story seems to center almost entirely around Bagrov and the deeds he'd done. While this is good for the start of the story to explain why he created the PMC, it is a running theme through the entirety of your lore. Focusing on one character delegitimizes the other characters and makes the entire group seem single character centric which makes goals for the group hard to maintain because they become the single character's goals and not the group's goals. Who are the other living members of the group and how did they come to meet Bagrov and join the PMC? 

Secondly: I couldn't help but ask why Russia would contract a small Chernarussian PMC to fight against their own people? In my opinion, they would not risk hiring a PMC to help them with anything during Chechen conflicts. They could not risk compromised data and intelligence. Furthermore, a few more of your contracts contradict what any military figures with any common sense would actually do. Consider the cost, intelligence protection, and resources needed. It would be too costly to maintain on an outsourced unit during wartime. The CDF have powerful resources at their disposal but choose not to expend them. Russia has vast numbers and a large pool of weaponized units. I don't think they would need to contract a tiny PMC. What made them special enough to forgo their limits on expenditures and allow for the PMC to be contracted? Considering they're likely not desperate, what is their reasoning otherwise? 

All in all, you have some conflicting information as well because I could not discern whether or not this is still a PMC group or a Hero/survivor group or something in between. Your punctuation and grammar also need a good look through.

Your improvement on the graphics is duly noted. That looks much better.

Also sorry for the delay. I was waiting for some extra information. 

Share this post


Link to post

Jesus guys.. maybe two walls of feedback back to back might be a bit too much Eh? Let the poor fellas breathe. Good luck on your group guys!

Share this post


Link to post
21 minutes ago, Joffrey said:

Jesus guys.. maybe two walls of feedback back to back might be a bit too much Eh? Let the poor fellas breathe. Good luck on your group guys!

6 hours between posts, and different information in each post? I dont believe its that bad. I can see how you would think that though. 

Share this post


Link to post
2 minutes ago, Taryn said:

6 hours between posts, and different information in each post? I dont believe its that bad. I can see how you would think that though. 

The issue is that it’s a fuck load of information to take in at the same time. Give em a chance to respond to the first feedback, then continue with more afterwards. 

Otherwise it can look very daunting and overwhelming to try to answer so many things and change whatever needs to be changed in one go. 

Also, not an attack on you, but sometimes it’s better to just take criticism/feedback on the chin and not become so defensive.

Share this post


Link to post
2 minutes ago, Dusty said:

Also, not an attack on you, but sometimes it’s better to just take criticism/feedback on the chin and not become so defensive.

I agreed with him. Thank you for the advice. 

Share this post


Link to post
3 minutes ago, Taryn said:

I agreed with him. Thank you for the advice. 

Thank you for you're feedback we will rework the lore and make it more centralized around the PMC and how and what they did.

Share this post


Link to post
10 hours ago, Loscham said:

@Papa Krieg, I'm going to caveat off of what @Taryn said here, about your goals. She has some other feedback she'd like to address, and I'll leave that to her. They are very generic, and most any group you meet will have similar (if not identical) basic goals. This doesn't mean they're not good goals, but a bit of expansion would be splendid. I'll put a bit of a bug into your ear, and let's see if that can't help you iron things out, addressing each goal.

1. How do you plan to make yourselves known? Give specifics here.

2. How are you going to help the people of Chernarus? Are you going to just give out supplies? Are you going to provide protection on trade routes? How aware are your characters of the current geopolitical situation throughout the land?

3. See above about the geopolitical situation. Offering yourselves up for hire may lead to some undesired consequences, HOWEVER, I've seen it work before.

4. This should be a basic goal of any group, unless they're completely nomadic. It's not so important (as far as group approval goes) that you set up an HQ, but more what you intend to do with it. If your intent is just to provide a base of operations, I'd leave that one out.

5. Again, even most bandit groups want this at this point. If you want to keep this as a goal, elaborate in detail about how you're going to do it; who will you work with to do it, and how. @Taryn had a really good suggestion for that.

6. See above. This is another goal of pretty much every group.

7. This can be folded into goal #5.

What we want to see in your goals is uniqueness, my friend. Think of something fresh you want to bring to the table of RP. It can be difficult, I know, to come up with fresh ideas when so many groups already exist and have come and gone, but if you put your mind to it, I'm sure you can think of things.

 

Thank you for your advice on the goals, I will take this advice heavily when I am working on re-configuring the goals.

Share this post


Link to post
Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
Sign in to follow this  
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...