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Illuminati is REAL?

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Illuminati. Who are they? Where do they come from? What do they want with us fat-folk? I am here on this beautiful October 2nd, 2016 to answer these frequently asked questions. First, we have to define the Illuminati:il·lu·mi·na·ti



  1. people claiming to possess special enlightenment or knowledge of something.
    "some mysterious standard known only to the Illuminati of the organization"
    • a sect of 16th-century Spanish heretics who claimed special religious enlightenment.
      plural proper noun: Illuminati
    • a Bavarian secret society founded in 1776, organized like the Freemasons.
      noun: Illuminati

Let's look at number one, shall we? First, the word, "Enlightenment". That's a big friggin word. Lets dumb it down to one particular word within that bigger word, which happens to be one word within a bunch of words describing another word. Light. Light is something that we need in our daily lives--not only to be able to see the world, but to also be able to see color. Like green for example. Anyway, back to the word. The pronunciation of Illuminati is Illuminate, which also means light. See how it connects? Second definition says enlightenment as well. Wow. It also says "religion". A connotation of religion is usually Christianity or Judaism. Next definition says "Freemasons". Well, VOID, what in tarnation does that mean? I will tell you, MapleMooses and Roach. a Freemason is a guy named mason who was alive in the 1800's who was announced free after world war 2. George Washington declared this, by the way. Now that we decoded the highly elaborate definitions, we will now go into deeper thoughts. 

Ever seen a trophy? Probably not, Lyca, since you have no talent to get you one. Trophy's are usually plastic gold with a football or some other sport or person on the tippy top. You set them on a table and they collect dust until your 84 year old grandma throws them away.

Back to light and colors. Green is a color that is commonly used to describe peace and harmony. Green is also used to describe grass and sports, like soccer. Don't get triggered brits, please. But the color is most commonly used for the Illuminati. The triangle has three sides and three points, unlike any other triangle. It has one eye, almost like a cyclops from that one greek guy named... uh... Pyniccius? I have honestly no clue. Looking for something? h3h3productions#sloths437464fdhfdbdfs3fdsj38efdhsasn. The triangle is a trophy for the Illuminati.

Last thing I have to say is that Illuminati is currently irrelevant. This needs to stop. Bring it back up using Code KEEM for 30% off on your GFuel. I am out of ideas, so... yeah. Illuminati is real, blah blah blah. #movedtomemes #codekeem #illuminate #rolleoftoiletpaper #leafyisgoingtodiebyafridge  

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