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Never Alone... Always

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You recover a journal, wet and nearly falling apart. Seems to have a few blood smears through the later pages, but is otherwise in good condition. Who would leave something like this just sitting here? You flip open the first page and read...


August 20

Well, it's my birthday today and my lovely wife decided to give me this journal. She says I need to capture my thoughts and feelings. I am only doing this to make her happy. Maybe she's right, I haven't been as open as I should be and I do love her so I'll give it a chance. Had a lovely cake, she made it the way I always like, and that night, she showed me how much she really loved me.

August 28

A week before their birthdays now, and I can't figure out what to get them. My boy is getting older now, too old for baby toys, but I don't know if he's ready for older kids toys yet. I can't wait until he's old enough for Lego's, they were my favorite thing in the world as a kid, but I think he'd just make a mess of them. I'll probably get him some puzzles and little toys, he'll have a good birthday.

As for my wife, she's tough to shop for. We've been married for six years now and I've gotten her everything she's asked for. I spoil her too much maybe. I'd get her more jewelry, but she has so much now she can't even wear it all. She has been going on about that dress she saw, so perhaps, but would that be too predictable? I'm sure whatever I get her, she'll be happy.

Sept 4

Today was my boy's birthday and I am sure he had a good day. Asleep with his toys surrounding him, red fire truck clutched in his hands, how I miss the innocence of youth, who knew a little bit of wood and plastic could be so enthralling. Now to figure out how we're going to pay for everything, she went a little over board this year and it's kind of drained us dry. I made plans for dinner tomorrow, but I may have to cancel them now. I can't decide if I'm upset at her, or if she's just trying to make his childhood something to remember. I don't even think I can remember being his age, I had to grow up so fast where I was I didn't really get a chance to remember anything. This will be good for him I'm sure.

Sept 5

It was her birthday today. How many times can a man say "I'm sorry" in a single night. Ruined dinner, wrong dress, nothing else to give. I screwed up more times today then I care to count. I did get her that flower while we were on our walk back, not a lot of people on the streets today. When we got home we had sex, but it was nothing like it used to be, bland and boring. I think it was her giving me pity and a silent way of saying she was sorry too, but is this how it's going to be from now on? I look at her laying next to me now sleeping and I can't help thinking she's going to get tired of me. I can't think that, I'll do something great for her, but I'll have to wait until I get paid again. Oh, work in the morning, signing off

Sept 16

Today was a good day. Started out like any other, got up, went to work, stopped by the store to pick up stuff for dinner. Ran in to an old friend, I haven't seen him for years, not since coming here. He said he was here on a mission. He always liked his secrets, worked with the government, some kind of health organization that looks for cures to plagues and such. Always on the move, we became good friends during his stay in the states, but what brings him here now. Talked about it to my wife, she seemed rather happy when I mentioned his name. It's always good to know you have friends close by, it was a rough move to here and we haven't really set up any roots. Feeling very fortunate and relieved today though. Brought my wife home a little gift, nothing extravagant, but a surprise none the less. She was so happy, we cuddled on the couch and watched a movie together, all three of us. Doesn't get any better than this!

Sept 30

Time to bundle up, it's getting colder outside, and they say some bugs are going around so we all need to take extra care of ourselves. Looks like we may have an early winter, I didn't really notice it, but then again the cold never bothered me. I need to make sure they don't get sick, and I can't get sick right now, things have been rough enough as is. Couldn't get much worse from here though right?

Oct 11

You wouldn't believe what we heard on the news, something about a virus or something that some locals got just a few towns over. People died, a couple of them the report said. That's a scary thought that these bugs are that serious. I'll have to find my friend and talk to him tomorrow, see if that's why he's here, and if there is anything we can do to keep from catching it. Man, my boss would be so pissed if I had to take some sick time right now.

Oct 17

It's been a week now. The quarantine hit everyone here hard, cut off from friends and family. The gunshots freaked me out, but I think my wife and boy are taking it much worse. They sent some policemen around and started asking questions about how we were feeling, if we'd made any contact with anyone that was sick, or if we were housing anyone who wasn't acting right. I asked them what was going on. They pushed me back and demanded any weapons in the house be turned over to them. I didn't tell them about sneaking out to the market, or about the over-under hidden in the bedroom, thought it might just stir up the hornets' nest, or was not telling them the bad thing?

Oct 21

The TV finally started working again, but only briefly for the day. A boy without his shows goes a little stir crazy. Flipped to the news again this evening, looks like they brought in some help from overseas, but even they couldn't figure it out. Some people are calling for evacuations as even more people are dying. There is something odd about this, we can't leave, no one is bringing food around now, and there are screams almost every night. I don't feel safe here anymore, I have to get out, I have to get my family to a safe place.

Oct 31

This is it.... I can't believe what I am seeing around me. People, no not people, walking around, stumbling in to walls and falling down hills. They are everywhere and I can't seem to make any head way on getting us out. Every time the boy cries cause he's hungry brings them closer. We've taken to bedding down in barns and sheds. Looks like everyone has cleared out, but I don't know where anyone is.

Nov 1

This has been a crazy few weeks. Finally saw some other people, but they were drunk, or high, or something had come over them. Sitting in the middle of the street with a bon fire going, every time one of the infected people walked over to them, they would shoot them, right in the head, for no reason. This of course attracted more, and then they shot those too. We watched for about ten minutes, then one of them came up behind us. It grabbed my wife and gave her a good scratch, I gave it a knock on the head with the butt of my gun. I guess there really isn't any reasoning with the infected. The sound made the other group nervous, and they fired a few shots our way. We got away clean and I patched her up as good as I could. She'll be ok.

Nov 24

It.... wasn't a scratch. It wasn't until a couple days ago she told me it was a bite. She got sick, really sick. To the point where after only a few hours she couldn't move. I now know how many times you can say "I love you" to a person, I can only bring myself to write this, for her. After she stopped breathing, we all just laid there, still, quiet, unsure of what to do. Then she moved, not her, not like this. I covered the boy with the blankets and ... (the words are blotted out by tiny drops of water) ... you.

Dec 3

It's so cold now. We can't move anywhere without having to avoid people, or the infected. We have to find some more food, and some warmer clothes. I know of a small military outpost to the west. Surely if there are still good people out there, they would be with the military and police. We'll make our way there tomorrow. I have hope that this is all just a bad dream.

Dec 24

I'm not sure what to write tonight. I put my pen to the paper because it feels like tonight should be special, a day for miracles to happen, but it doesn't. There was a large group at the military base, looks like it had been overrun by infected, but some guys went in and cleaned it out. I don't know if they are the trust worthy type, they were all in military garb, but none of them acted like the military guys I'd seen before. I'll wait a few hours and sneak in to get some stuff.

Dec 25

(this page is riddled with streaks and pen smears, you struggle to make out the words, but it is just legible)

I got plenty of food, a new gun, ammo, blankets, backpacks, everything you need to survive. Everything YOU need god damn it. I just want them back, I give it all up, you can take it, just give them back to me! We made our way to the town northeast, when we saw a lone guy sitting by the church. I should have kept following my instinct, but instead we approached. He was nice enough, said he had food, water, and warmth in the church, we just had to listen to his sermon. He said it'd been a long time. There were a couple of trees out front, decorated up like you see in malls during this time of year. When my boy saw it he ran over to it, he could see the little teddy bears at the base. As he reached out for one the man raised a pistol.... pointed it at MY child.... and took him from me, going on about the lords work. I took up my rifle and filled the man with so many holes he didn't know which one to take his final breath from. It was about then that couple other men burst from the church gunning my direction. I took a hit to the leg, but my anger staved the pain long enough to make sure they knew a husband and fathers rage! After it was done, and I bandaged my leg, and I made my way over to the tree. A little body laying there as peaceful as an angel. I placed him at the base of the tree, wrapped the branches around him... so he wouldn't get cold, put a teddy bear in his arms with his wooden fire truck and kissed him on the forehead. I love you my little man. Always.

Jan 1


Jan 9

Wandering, out of sorts and with no destination, I met some men today. Determined, I approached, ready to meet my end as well. They were kind, like they could feel my pain with me. Several of them were telling stories of what had happened to them, and how they had gotten here. I neglected to tell them mine, it was still too painful for me to bring up. They let me join their group, there were quite a few and it just felt safer in numbers. We are now headed to the place called Green Mountain. I guess they know some more people up there who are going to help them. They say there has been a rush of bad people, and they saw fit to stop them. Can't argue with that now can I.

Jan 17

Green Mountain is a nice place, plenty of space, and well protected enough. Everyone has been so nice. The plan is to set out for a place north, sounds like there are some groups out there who like to just kill for the fun, and we seek to bring them the mercy they show so many each day, a little distraction, some grenades, and lots of fire power. I'll either not be alone from here on out, or I get to see my family again soon knowing I was trying to do good by their names. Good-bye.

(the final page has a drawing of what looks like a woman and child, hearts drawn by their heads, and the top corner of the page torn out)

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  • Emerald

Good read Caution. Might be a tad too much, so shortening it for future entries wouldn't hurt :)

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A good read man. I like how you write about pre-apocalypse and how things gradually goes to shit. But as Rick mentioned, it is a bit long :)

Imo it could also use a touch of text-editing, like "italicize" some of the text, try out a different font to make it easier to read maybe(?).

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