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Victoria's [Vanu] Journal

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Vanu    0

Journal Entry #1: - Split Apart

I thought I was dead, but I guess luck saved me this time when I swam ashore on this unknown island the brutal waves has brought us. As for today, I'm gonna keep a record on this old green journal I found in a broken shed with nothing written in it. The journal is in good condition with a pen inside, except a huge scratch that was made in the back of the book. So if anyone finds it when I die, they will know my story. My name is Victoria McCloud - or Vanu you can call me. I was a survivalist since the outbreak with my partner Ty Franke or T... you can call him. We were great partners in surviving. We knew the woods too well, and stayed away from cities. We lived a peaceful life... until a storm came upon us when we were fishing and washed us away in sea into a unknown course. Our boat capsized.. and we got split up in the process. I washed ashore and fell unconscious on the beach from fatigue. What made me wake up and run? The sounds of the dark... grucim growling of a undead running towards me... my heart jumped and race as I got up and sprinted for life into the safe woods until it got calm and my heart pounded for ages.

As for I'm feeling now.... sad... but determined to find him. I know.. or have a feeling he as well washed ashore. I worry about his safety. I have nothing on me..... only the clothes I wore and the wet life jacket I got rid of... and this journal with me to keep company. I'm worried now... wondering in the unknown.. how many undead their were, or is their any civilization here.

Following this road and writing in this journal under a tree until I have energy to walk again. I haven't had food or water for a day.. hoping to find something as a trek along looking for any sign of farmhouse or something. I will end this journal today, hoping to write another day when I feel better.

- ....... always run.... always move

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Heroz_Nick    21

Heartbreaking.. but never the less wanting to hear more, Nice First entry! Safe travels on your journey :)

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Vanu    0

Journal Entry #2 - Memories of a Child - Shutting down

I barely have enough energy left to write the second page of this journal. My stomach hurts.... badly... I feel like I'm going to collapsed..... my mouth is very dry and I'm losing life fast... I mean, dying of dehydration is worse than I thought. You want to feel slow death? Try running all day... no water, washed ashore from salt water in your mouth. You feel like you just want to lay on the ground with shallow breaths and let a undead eat you alive.

I could barely breath anymore... every time I do it feels like I'm just breathing in sandy or salty air. All day as the sun beating down on this land, from the road I decided to run in the trees... hoping to find something... nothing, only trees, trees and more trees, at one point I thought the trees were spinning, but I guess it was just my mind playing tricks on me. During the day my hopes sunk more and more as I found a few houses here and there... but they were locked or barricading in. I was guessing life on this land is gone as well.

I thought my mind was playing tricks again when in the distance I saw a town and a small airport. The sun was setting fast... and shadows of the night grew. It was dark when arrived in town cautiously. I sat down for a moment since I felt dizzy to walk again. When I sat down in the silence of the night the moon gave some light... revealing slow movements of shadows walking with deathening footsteps. The sounds... of the undead were growls of evil beings and spirits... giving a shiver down my spine. With caution and crouching low... I quietly went into a log cabin that was open. Making careful moves so the undead are not attracted to sound. I made sure those evil but retarded beings are faced away.

As I went into the cabin the hope for something to drink was not there. No taps worked.. nothing in this cabin was left behind. I sighed, but in the corner of my eye something bright green made me look. It was a little school girl backpack.. bright green with pink flowers on it. I bent down examining it... nothing was in it... except a certain name that was written in black marker on the inside... and a picture of a little blond girl. Her name was Cassy... and the picture was a small blond little girl about 4, seems like she was standing in-front of a school... must of been her first day of school. She was smiling funny and waving in the picture... holding her knapsack on her. Looking at this picture suddenly something wet was on my cheek. It was a tear... I was sniffling... saddening because of this little girl. The events that happened recently with the undead... just imagine a little girl being snapped down by undead teeth like a shark... the screaming of the girl and maybe the parents screaming as well. Suddenly I pictured this moment... like I was in the past for a split second. I shook my head as screams were filling in my head. I dropped the picture and stepped back... knocking down a table. I covered my mouth as suddenly a zombie growled nearby.

I quickly sprinted out the house and past town... with a zombie chasing me. I lost him easily into the borderland woods... but I layed down because I felt dizzy again, this time passing out for about a minute. As I woke up... silence was again, but I was close to the small airport. I went up to the airport as I saw several undead walk out of the ACT and 2 air hangers. I waited until they are far from the building, and silently went to the ACT. I closed the doors quietly and looked around, nothing... I went until the top floor where there was a big travel backpack and a crowbar. I slinged the bag on and grabbed the crowbar... it was more heavy then I thought... or my lack or water is making me weak. I continue to run East, according to where the moon was facing.

Walking along this main highway hoping for some kind of water to find... hours passed as I had to stop and sit or even pass out for a few minutes sometimes... hoping not to wake up with a missing arm or a painful bite on me. Finally in the horizon, huge buildings were in the distance. A smile went across my face as I approached it..... but something was wrong. When I approached the city... no zombies were here, and usually they are attracted to any structure like a building. No undead were lingering... their was only silence of the ocean and fire crackling what seems to be burning barrels. I thought someone was here lighting these barrels up, but their was no sign of anything.

I searched and searched recklessly, looking for just something... something to drink as I started to go insane about seeing water somewhere. I saw a drink machine.... but nothing was in it as it was shining a light like heaven above. I sighed.. started crying a bit of hopelessness fell upon me... dying of dehydration is not fun... your body slowly shuts down with pain in the stomach, throat, head, and mouth. I looked down after wiping my face... seeing a can of macaroni. I grabbed my crowbar I was straddling and broke it open, spilling some food all over. I wasn't after the food, even if I did eat it, I was trying to suck up any liquid residue the can had. It only made my mouth wet for 5 minutes.

I walked out the building slowly... knees buckling as I barely could walk anymore. But something caught my eye again, their was a dead zombie.... hit in the head by something sharp. The head was split in the brain... with seeing the blood the body was fresh. Someone killed the undead not long ago, someone must be in this big city. I wanted to look for the person, but I couldn't walk another step.

So I'm sitting here now, waiting for either someone, a undead, or my body shuts down... writing this journal in a building I'm unaware of. Was it Ty? Was he looking for me? Or is it another survivor? I reached for my pocket were a ruined picture from water was in my hands. It was a picture of me and Ty hunting for rabbit. We were carrying one caught rabbit each and smiling. I smiled a bit..... then looked up the moon with wary eyes, hoping someone will find me.

........ always run...... always move

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Vanu    0

Journal Entry #3 - Struggles

The first thing that rushed into my ears was the sound of a rumbling engine. The senses in my body were coming to life again, the feel of the crisp air on my fingers... the crowbar on my hand, the smell of dead bodies, then the sight of blurr, and the feeling of a dry mouth and throat. What woke me up sudden was the engine of a pick-up truck and the screaming of zombies rushing with quick foot steps. My sight was still blurring, it seemed like a passed out again, in the front door of a hotel lobby. I try to move... but my whole body felt immobilized. The only moving body parts was my fingers clutching onto the crowbar as tight as possible. My stomach was in extreme pain.. if I threw up... I would feel even more pain.. and probably die by then.

I inched my head a little to the sound of a rumbling engine. There, a truck two blocks down parked in-front of a superstore. I couldn't get the color, only the shape and shadows moving in the store. It was still night, and barely the light of the moon shined upon the land. I couldn't tell which were the undead and which were the survivors. This was my hope... a hope that I can't reach. Because with a take a breath and try to exhale... no voice is heard out... only the slight. painful cough of throat.. almost throwing up. I try to lift the crowbar and make a noise... but it was no match for the sound of screaming zombies and rumbling engine. So I lay hear helplessly, hoping the truck will drive by here.

But looking at the superstore gave me a bit more adrenaline, so I started crawling slowly..... exposing myself if any undead will see me.... I will die by the biting of undead to try to get some sort of help or water. Slowly.... and quietly.... holding my stomach and using one arm to drag myself inching closer and closer to the store.

As it seemed like hours... I reached the first block, but as I did the truck started to turn and move away from me. No... why.... why did they, how could they leave me here... why didn't they see me?! My rage in my head made me have a headache for a moment. I kept crawling.... towards the store maybe they left something behind. The smell of the dead undead wrenched my nose as I was crawling nearby dead zombies that the survivors had killed. I slowly inched my way up the stairs... I felt like a crawling undead myself. I went slowly inside... something caught my eye. It seemed like a can-tine was laying on the floor, dropped accidentally by one of the survivors. I reached for it with my arm and grabbed it. The moment I did the hopes and joy of my life as come when I felt their was water splashing inside the container. The sound of the water was the only thing that filled my ears now... nothing else. I crawled slowly to the back of the store away from any undead sight. Carefully.... I opened the container and smelled it. It smelled like water... slowly... I sipped just a bit of water.... the smooth... cool.... hydrating feel massaged my mouth and throat. I was careful not to chug it.... because if I did I could get sick so easily from suffering severe dehydration.

After about a hour of two, I finished the container of water slowly and sat down to rest for a moment. This was not the end for me..... and suffering dehydration will be a ongoing suffering... unless I find the ingredients I need to boil water. Such as matches and sources to find a fire. I have to keep moving in the dark, perfect timing to avoid the undead so I can hide in the shadows.

I trudged on West in the borderline of the forest... according to where the moon was setting as well. I decided to head back to the small airport where their was a town nearby I didn't fully look at. It was all night and soon it will be dawn. The nights of the forest was odd... their was no wildlife. I never had such silence in my ears... it's very eerie because we as humans are used to the constant sounds in our ears when their was civilization.

In the distance I saw something huge.... tall walls that were barricaded inside. Was it a camp for survivors? The military it was to be. Over the walls I can see barracks and more military structures. Hopes for me that this was a military base for survivors to live... maybe personnel here as well.

I jogged a bit... but as I slowed down and came against the walls.... it was silent. I followed the wall... very long wall... I was surprised how close this base was to the huge highway near the beach. As I turned around a corner of a wall, their was a gate and watchposts. I slowly walked up to the front entrance.... I put my hand over my mouth and shook my head in disbelief. Dead soldiers.... everywhere.... broken vehicles..... exploded vehicles.. the stench of dead...... body bags everywhere.... I broke into tears.... as a fellow trainee myself it broke my heart to see this. I crouched down feeling the dead bodies... none of them showing signs of warm skin or pulse.

I walked into a abandoned office after checking the bodies... only seeing empty shelves and stuff laying all over the ground. One dead soldier was laying inside... he looked to be a high rank, beside him was a AK gun... I wasn't sure and a clip inside. I put my crowbar hooked to my backpack and picked it up. With my little skills of knowledge the gun was full and ready to fire. I checked and looked at it, it looked pristine and well cleaned like a real soldier would do. I searched the soldier... finding more clips of the semi-automatic weapon and put it in my backpack. I didn't feel right having this weapon, but to survive I guess I'll pass on the survival from one person to another.

I continue to look around... I decided to go to the top of the air military tower to get a view distance to where I want to go next. I slinged the weapon and climbed a top a ladder a growl and body standing on the tower was there as well. A undead! I stood there, it was closing on me fast waiting to munch on my fresh flesh and bones. I quickly grabbed my crowbar and raised it, hammering it down right on the head. I watched as the crowbar end was deepened into the skull, making the white eyes and bloody head stop looking at me and drop down. The undead lowered his arms that were about on my reach and started to fall. When it fell my crowbar snapped off and a 'thump' of the body went on the floor. I quickly to another swing at the head to make sure it was dead. I wiped the blood and flesh off the crowbar on the undead and stepped back catching my breath. As I thought it was a dead, I scouted around the area on top of the tower... what I only see is dead bodies laying everywhere.... the airstrip.... and a town nearby. I might head to the town.... or north more inward into the land. My hopes for Ty alive [he never been online yet and I think he can't yet or doesn't want to be OOC] or being alive is wearing thin. I would have to take a moment in a day or two if I'm still alive to do a memorial for him. That would be the most difficult day of my life.

.......... always run......... always move

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Vanu    0

Journal #4 - A New Home

A woke up with a sudden jolt on the roof of the ACT tower. It was in the middle of the night.... I don't even know how many nights I spent since I washed ashore... 4th one now? I must of fell asleep all of sudden after killing the undead that's on the roof with me. I looked over at the body.. flies were starting to swarm and eat the dead body. I was glad to be alive again, I picked up the semi-automatic rifle I found and looked at it again, it labelled as a AK-107... hm.. not bad.

Still.. my mind was distracted... something was wrong.... something... didn't feel right. I scanned the runway full of dead soldiers then spotted something that didn't look right in the picture. Across the runway was a body I was eyeing on, a fresh one. I immediately went down the ladder and sprinted towards it. There was no undead around.. and the lighting of the runway shined on the body. I stopped sprinting and walked very slowly up to the body, crouching low as a approached on it. I pointed my gun at the body, in case it was a undead... or turning into one perhaps. It wasn't breathing, wasn't moving... I poked it with the tip of my gun.. slowly... okay.. he was dead. Still...

"hello? are you alive?"

I asked... maybe he was sleeping... wait... he wasn't breathing, doi. I sat down... tears started to roll down my eyes, how did he die? I looked at his face, it looked like he was horrified of something before his death. His eyes are still open and so was his mouth. I carefully laid my fingers over his eyelids and shut them... signifying to have a peaceful endless sleep. I shook my head... and look at his equipment he had. He was well armed with different weapons, and a bigger backpack. I unzipped the pack, revealing yet another weapon and food and bottled water. Still tearing down... I wiped the water on my face and continuously apologizing to the dead man while I stripped his backpack off and took his rifles.

After I finished, I ripped a piece of shirt from the hunting knife I found and put it in my pocket in reminder of this man. I felt very guilty stealing from this body, but in a world like this.... things have to happen, but I promise myself one thing and one thing only... that I will never rob someone that is alive. Only people who will do that will have bad luck. When I rolled the body over a 5L jug of gasoline sealed was in his hands, I wonder why.... was their a vehicle nearby? Maybe. I looked up, the building he was beside was a fire-station tower... it looks to be one of the windows were broken on the high floors, and broken glass near him. Did he jump to his death? Did the undead chase him in those skinny stairs and he had no way out? He was armed though... maybe the undead pushed him through the glass or something... poor guy... I grabbed his full 5L, tightened the heavy backpack with a small wooden hatchet in my other hand, and slinged the rifle over my shoulder.

I walked north to the dark forest, provided by the slightest shine of moon light, and putting the airfield to my back. Just as I went around the corner of the last building in the nearby town, a vehicle I spotted as sitting behind a house. I was interested in it because how unbroken it looked. I put my jug of gasoline down and looked inside. A key was in the ignition, was it running? I checked around the vehicle, a tire looked a bit flat but good to run. I threw my stuff in the vehicle, then jumped in the driver seat. This was some sort of military vehicle old style world war two. It was open hood but armored front and sides. I put my hands carefully on the key... I thought for a second, must of been from the guy who was trying to get gas. As I turned the key the loud vehicle roared to life! I can't believe it... a running vehicle.... this will be my new home I'll sleep it. Then I noticed the low fuel sign, I jumped out and quickly poured the jug in the fuel tank then went back in as I heard crying undead screams and running figures coming towards me. I carefully put into drive and went forward, a undead came running infront of the vehicle. I honked, then easily runned him over, hearing the squishing and cracking of bones underneath the vehicle.

After some excitement, I decided to drive on the main road where the ocean is... figuring their might be gas stations I can try to salvage for fuel before running north inland. I drove for about 10 minutes West, hitting a gas station I remember seeing before seeing the airfield.

I rolled up carefully and shined the headlights on the fuel tanks so I can see. I shut off the engine, keeping the lights on. I couple devilish screams were heard and I looked around. Trying to adjust to the darkness I raised my hatchet. One undead was coming towards me, I waited for the perfect moment... a few feet from me until I swung down on it's shoulder. Dam I missed the head. The undead was pushing me back as I held on to the hatchet. I kicked it back, ripping the hatchet off. I swung again immediately, hitting the head this time. It stopped suddenly then dropped down like dead weight. I ripped the bloody hatchet off and looked around for the second undead. He was crawling... probably with broken legs. This was easy, went around him quickly and stepped on his back, making him stop crawling. He growled as I swung down on the back of his head, killing him. I wiped the bloody hatchet off the shirt and grass. I would have to clean this later. Silence filled the area... only crickets sound now. I went over to the big fuel tanks. I knocked on one and listened carefully, the first one was empty. I knocked on the second, I can hear a bit of splashing inside. I quickly looked for the small overfill tap and opened it, letting dark liquid pour into the 5L jug. It definitely smelled like fuel. I turned off and filled the vehicle, and repeated for awhile because of the small jug, that I knew the fuel tank was big.

After awhile I checked how fuel the tank was... 3/4 full... I decided to do 5 more fills before heading off and keeping one full. I'm sure there will be more tanks to look for. As I filled my last one... I heard a roaring engine from the East. I quickly put the jug in the vehicle, grabbed my AK and hid behind the vehicle. There! To the west was a huge looking convoy military vehicle... a URAL... driving closer... with no lights on. It slowed down infront of the gas station then rolled by it until it went into complete stop. In the shadows I saw about 4-5 men sitting in the back. I lowered my rifle down... I couldn't take these guys on... whatever is going to happen is not something good I know that. I came out of hiding spot behind my vehicle when one of the men jumping off the back approached me. He had some sort of gun bigger then mine. I stepped back a bit shivering... afraid. I couldn't even barely hold my rifle. Another guy standing close to he ural was pointing a gun at me, then lowering it after someone told him to in a hushing voice. The man standing close to me spoke in a booming, loud, and demanding russian accent... or I think it was russian.

"What is your name?!"

Why would anyone care about names if they are so hostile? I stuttered my words, trying to keep a firm posture and not afraid.

"Vi... v.. Victoria.... "

I clutched my rifle tighter so my hands started sweating.

"NO! Your two names! Your other name!"

I clinched a little by the booming voice. I knew what he meant by his broken english.

"McCloud."

Suddenly a voice from the vehicle yelled.

"Hey! This is no time to play with woman! We have some business to take care of! Let's go! She has no mean for us." Business? No means? I was guessing they were looking for someone... more people... or something. The man standing near me spoke more quieter.

"It is nice to meet you Victoria. Can you handle that rifle?"

I looked down, my knuckles were turning white, I quickly put my hands in the proper positions to how to hold a rifle. I nodded my head.

"We will meet again Victoria, goodbye."

And with that he climbed in the back, and the URAL drove off... heading West. I exhaled a long... breath... like I never breathed for those few minutes. Those men were wearing military clothing and everything... I thought I was dead like the undead. I quickly hopped in and drove, continuing East.

I looked at the clock on the vehicle hopping it was correct, it was 6am and the sun was rising. I didn't want to continuing driving at day time, plus I couldn't drive more and wanted to go at night. I wanted to wait until night time before entering the next city then heading north from any northern road from there. So I pulled off the road.. see a warehouse I parked inside it... shut the loud doors.. use some twine and rope I found in the warehouse to tie the doors shut so no one would come in. I would hear the loud doors anyway if anyone tries to open them. I climbed in the back seat... curled up and went to sleep. This was my new mobile home.... after savaging a few places on the way at night.. my new home was stuffed.

........always run....... always move

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Vanu    0

Journal #5 - Death from above

BAM! I first thought I was dreaming... BAM! Again... I jolted up awake holding on to my AK that was laying beside me. I looked towards the door.... was someone there? I jumped out of the vehicle and slowly walked towards the noise was from. I cut the rope that was holding the two doors shut with the hunting knife and waiting... if someone was trying to open it would of opened by now. It didn't, the noise stopped. I leaned against the door, quickly I opened the door a inch and pointed the gun outside. No one was out there, but it was sure dam windy. I stepped out and scanned the area, ready to shoot anything that moves. No one will take my home away. After scanning and no one was around, I eased a bit. I looked up in the darkening sky. I must of slept all day, never had a sleep this good in the past 5 days. Dark, thick, clouds were moving fast in the sky, following the gusting winds. I then heard the bang again and knew where it was from. It was just the wind making the doors move a bit and noise, because they were metal. It reminded me missing home.... where I grew up. The small hanger my dad used to have, those metal doors would make noise when it was windy. It was going to be a dark night and I would have to drive with bright headlights this time. It looked like a chilly night with rain on the way. I opened the doors fully, started the vehicle, and headed out, continuing East.

Not long of a drive when it started to rain. I hid my equipment under seats so it doesn't get too wet.... hoping the rain stops soon. Ahead of me was a city in the horizon, the only difference was the darkness I came across. Upon entering the city was the same one I almost died in. Yes, I been traveling back and forth of the two areas for 5 days now, and finally decided to head north. Before I head north though, I wanted to find enough supplies to survive at least a week.

I carefully drove in the main roads of the city, it was almost nearly impossible to drive through. I bunch of barricades left behind, junk, broken vehicles were left on the road. Every now and then I stopped the vehicle, get out, salvage quickly, and continue on different buildings and businesses. My backpack was getting full, so I just threw stuff in the back of the vehicle. I had no trouble of the undead, because they were dumb enough to just run to my vehicle and get run over, which was a easy pass for me.

My last stop was the hospital and camp they had outside. I shut the engine off, jumped out and went to the back of the hospital where the tents were. The light from my vehicle shined brightly enough that upon entering a man was standing there in the light, staring at me. As soon as I noticed him, I jumped with a sudden scream then covered my mouth. Just at that all of sudden a undead came jumping out of no where from the darkness upon the man, it hit him on the shoulder. I holstered my rifle and grabbed my hatchet to chase after the undead after the man. The man ran into a tent, where the undead suddenly got confused and stood in the entrance. Before I can approach it, the man shot a bullet in the face of the undead, dropping him dead. I looked down at that undead, then at the man, then back at him, like I was confused. I took a note of the man, he was dressed like the men that met me at the gas station the other night, he had a huge weapon. I couldn't think what to say, except apologizing.

"I.. I am sorry I didn't warn you of the undead before you got hit, are you okay?"

He looked at me with a blank stare, but showed some aggression, or anger inside him. He showed no emotion what's so ever except anger. He had a Russian accent as well....

"Ah, it's fine... a few bruises."

I nodded, then immediately went into question in case I was in danger.

"Are you.... from the URAL that drove by me at the gas station with the other men?"

He glared for a moment...

"Men.... what men.. and no, I am not with them. I don't know what your talking about I am Omar... that is me. Who are you?"

I figure he was lying at first...

"I am Victoria... McCloud... you sure have the same Russian accent as them... are you sure you never saw me before?"

He walked towards me closer enough I can see some features of his face.

"Does it look like I come from the Russian country, don't you see the features of my face that state I am from there?"

I shook my head.. getting afraid...

"No... no sir I can't really say it is dark."

He grumbled and went towards the light from my truck.

"Now do you see? hm?"

I nodded... I didn't know he was trying to get me to state he was from Russia or not, but I didn't get a straight answer. "These men... you speak of.. who were they?"

I try to recap my memories...

"There were like... 6 of them, same accent as you... I couldn't see them really clearly, they were driving a URAL. They also just asked for my name... then left, something about business about they were talking about. Is their other groups out here on this land?"

He nodded pacing around the tents.

"Yes... many groups... some good some bad... you are not from here no?"

I shook my head.

"I come from.... different land... um... near here but got lost in fishing trip." He looked at me with a stare, like he was studying me. Then looked out in the distance.

"Is that your car?"

I looked back at the vehicle and nodded...

"Where you find it?"

I told him I found it near a airport. He then spoke of something that caught my mind,

"Their is this survival camp, near Berezino... I need to get there."

I knew where he was getting at, of course if I said no.... he would probably shoot me and steal my vehicle anyway.

"Ah.. yes... is it far, you need a ride? Is their people there?"

He looked back at me,

"Yes, friendly people, nice people..... they have good supplies sometimes yes. So give ride?"

I nodded and walked towards the vehicle, making sure I get to driving seat first. I wanted to know what this survival camp was, mind of well give this odd person a ride.

"Just tell me where to drive and I'll get there."

He nodded with no emotion and told me where to go.

We headed East, for a longgg drive... and eventually headed North. Along the way we hit another gas station because we needed some fuel again, he told me it was a long NE drive along the coast. As we were filling up... a engine... familiar one I heard in the distance was coming from the West.

"Omar! Vehicle! It is the same one I met night before."

He was busy killing zombies with his hatchet, once he gave the last swing he ran towards me.. but it was too late, the roaring URAL with about 6 men drove by slowly, but kept going this time heading East on the road we were heading to. "Those men, are they friendly?"

I rushed my words..

"No.. no... I don't know, they just ask for my name and left."

I finished emptying my can and jumped in driver seat as he shouted we should go.

"We must go around next city... they might set trap on us, go North offroad."

After some bumpy offroading we hit a dirt road that Omar told me to follow until we hit a town. I was very lost.. it seemed like we were in the middle of no where, driving a long time all night. It's been about 2 hour drive when the fuel gage started to go below half.

Finally, we hit a town he told me to stop at the sign so he can read it. I looked at the sign, I could not read it..... some weird alphabet. He read it smoothly then pulled out a map from his pocket. It revealed the whole map of the land I was in.... I didn't know the land was this big! We must of traveled far. I asked him where we came from, he pointed at a city far south from we were.... I looked at it.. that must of where I was, I saw a airport as well where I thought I was as well. He then pointed where we have to go, I saw the name he was talking about.. Berezino, I saw the name written and kind of understood the language. He then told me to keep driving.. so I did.

After some driving and ended up in another town, he told me we were going the wrong way, and cursed himself for not knowing directions. We went back to the town that we first stopped at, he stared at the map and told me to go different way. Then we went wrong way again, and headed back to town again.

"Omar you stupid fuk what are you doing?!"

He was yelling and cursing at himself again. I try to calm him down saying that he was just frustrated about the whole scene and the undead getting at us. After driving around in circles and keep hitting a town named Gorka, he asked if he can drive because I was missing a turn I wasn't paying attention to. I almost went angry for a moment, for he was blaming me now, but I figure to give him a chance because he knows about the camp.

I jumped in the back seat letting him drive around, he was talking to himself, stopping every 15 minutes to check on his map he made. Finally he calmed himself saying that we are finally on the right paved road getting close to Berezino. My hopes went up.... but you know.... when your hopes go up... it always comes down. As we drove slowly and stopped again to check his map, I heard yelling, accent voices like his in the distance.

"TURN OFF THE ENGINE, TURN IT OFF NOW, DON'T DRIVE ON YOU'LL BE SHOT." [clearly at this point we are getting robbed, but I heard this was against rules I don't know? We were on a paved road]

I panicked, grabbing my rifle and looking around, I couldn't see anyone, it was too dark. I can hear Omar under his angry low breath

"FUKIN BANDITS"

The voices continue to boom

"PUT THAT WEAPON DOWN, PUT EVERYTHING IN THE VEHICLE, IF WE SEE ANYMORE WEAPONS YOU WILL BE SHOT."

I complied and stripped everything off except my hunting knife, compass, journal, and extra map Omar gave me. As I did I finally saw two men come out of the bushes, one in a ghuille suit and one in military clothing.

"Fukin piece of shit bandits go away."

Omar's voice was loud enough for the bandits to hear. They shouted back,

"Don't fukin say shit to us, now put everything the fuck away or you will be shot."

I had anger... but stayed calm... I was taught to stay calm in the military, but living this this state for 5 nights it was difficult.

"Now, if you come out of the vehicle with any weapon you will be shot. "

Jeez... these guys are not that particular, does a hunting knife count? I had it hidden in my boot.

"Passenger woman step out, now."

I took a deep breath and slowly, I couldn't believe how calm I was.... no emotion, maybe I was so mad I couldn't show emotion, but I know I will break out at some point. I slowly jumped out of the vehicle walking slowly away from it. A man approached very close to me pointing a gun at my face. I stared at the pinpoint barrel of the gun, waiting until a flash or something to just kill me right here and now. But he stepped back a bit, telling me to keep my hands away from my pocket. I put my hands on my head and kept it there. As I did I can hear Omar and the other dude yelling at each other with curses. Omar stepped out of the vehicle, walking with clenched fists.

"You fukin bandits leave us the fuck alone you pieces of shit... mother fuckers....."

The man shot in the air trying to scare us, it jumped me a bit.

"You shithead put your fukin hands up and don't say another fukin word about us or you will die right here and now!!!"

He shot again this time towards a running undead coming towards him, I didn't know how many bullets he put in that undead but it was sure dead now. I just stood quiet... not saying anything as Omar did most of the cursing on these guys, which didn't help.

"Look what you fuckin make me do! Fukin waste bullets on the zombie you piece of shit you will be dead like that zombie if you don't shut the fuck up!"

Still... Omar kept talking and made the other bandit shoot right beside him, I'm sure for a moment Omar was dead. I wasn't paying attention to the other bandit who was watching me was yelling in my ear to get in the back of the vehicle. I slowly jumped in the passenger seat where he pointed me to. Soon after Omar was inside as well, still cursing under his breath. With that... one of the bandits started driving while the other sat with us, ready to shoot any sudden moves we make.

.............always run..............always move....

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Journal #6 - Lost friend [apologize for not remembering all the words said and events happening]

I was silenced in the first couple minutes of the ride... so tensed up that I didn't move a inch... thinking this was all a dream.... this was all a dream yes? No... this was real.. this is what is happening now.

The cool evening breeze with the vehicle moving was making me cold as I was sitting still. I stared out in the distance ignoring the men and Omar. The men in the vehicle started speaking, interrupting my thoughts and ignorance.

"So... you two cooperate, and no one get shot okay? Now, what is your names?"

I was about to speak when Omar spoke very loudly,

"YOU FUKIN IDIOTS WHY KNOW OUR NAMES? Mine is [i don't remember the full name but I called him Omar] Omar, okay?! We both from Russia, we have same accents, we are friends now yes? Now let us go, you have nothing from us." There was a split silence until the man in the back spoke,

"You better watch what your saying, and I don't think friends are what we are. Lady, what is your name? and maybe speak more mature and not like this shithead."

I kept my head turned away into the distance while I spoke, my voice was stern and firm,

"Victoria McCloud".

Of course they didn't say their names, they just stayed silent and mumered my name under their breath.

"Where are you from?"

Omar spoke first... again, of course he did.

"The fuck you should you are fucked in the head for now knowing tha.... "

"HEY WHY DON'T YOU SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH, RIGHT? I'll PULL OVER RIGHT NOW AND SHOOT BOTH OF YOU IN THE FUCKING FACE UNTIL YOU DON'T HAVE ONE."

Omar growled under his breath, saying something I couldn't understand.

"Now... where, are... you.. from, and don't make me repeat myself."

Omar finally complied and told his story, but in a cursed way that probably angered them even more. After he spoke they asked me, I took a deep breath keeping my head turned away.

"I came from different land not far from here, washed ashore..... from a fishing trip.... I... "

I started to feel emotions overcoming me, I feel my eyes watering, the thoughts through my head of dying, or what they are going to do with me, anything evil was coming across my mind as I was trying to tell my story. I stammered a lot, like my story didn't seem sense. The driver interrupted as I was almost done speaking,

"No, you are friends with him yes? I think you are lying... story no sense at all."

Omar barged in,

"YOU FUCKING IDIOTS, SHE DOESN'T REMEMBER CAN'T YOU TELL?! SHE IS STUPID, STUPID WOMAN I TELL YOU!"

No one spoke for a moment, the water in my eyes started to slowly leak out as tears, my voice almost cracked as I spoke. "I been hit... a few times in the head... not remembering, I.... I... was hit by the creatures a couple times."

The driver spoke...

"Hm... I believe you are with Omar... I believe you have group yes?"

I shook my head...

"No.... I don't ... I don't know anyone, we just met.... I..... I just came here 4 days ago."

Suddenly the subject changed.

"Well, here is what going to happen, we are going to interrogate you. We want to know more things... see... one of our friends were captured by a bad group in a vehicle just like this one."

I wiped my tears off my face, a friend captured in a vehicle like this one? I thought for a moment, this can't be the same vehicle. I spoke, trying to stay strong, but my voice was getting weaker.

"What? how is that possible? I had this vehicle for 2 days now."

I then started sniffling.... all the emotional weight just... hammered down on me. The thoughts of torture... assault... be beaten... dying, just.. I couldn't take it no more. The thought of Ty.... missing him..... My heart hurts... it hurts too much. I hugged myself, suddenly I sniffled loud enough that my voice started to make soft... crying noises. Not fully crying like a baby, more like... just little noises... softly. My tears slowly went down my cheeks, reaching the end of the face... then dripping off of me carefully. I brought my knees up to my face and buried my face in there, trying to black out all the hearing and thoughts in my mind, but they kept flowing in. A voice spoke that rendered to my brain.

"Oh don't cry now.... you'll be alright as long as you answer our questions yes?"

I try to hold back the sniffling but I knew... whatever I would say.... would be a lie to them even though it's a truth. That was the most fear I had... when your telling the truth and they think you are lying. Trust is the most difficult thing to encounter.

I stayed quiet for the rest of the ride, along trying to ignore Omar and the two bandits still bickering at each other. I stopped my emotions and finally continued to just look out to the distance.

We drove offroad into the forest, near a dam, it was soon dawn and things started to light up. The vehicle came to a halt just surrounded by trees. The bandit in the back seat jumped out, pointing the machine gun at us, he first ordered Omar to jump out. If course Omar bickered at them first before they told him again, he finally jumped out, still cursing at them. The guillie suit bandit ordered him to to sit at the tree he pointed at. He slowly started walking over there, looking back every second... like he was planning something. Well... as soon as the man told me to get out, he was looking at me. That is when Omar started to sprint.... the driver yelled at his partner that he was running. Before Omar got even 20 meters, the loud crackling of gunfire and yelling filled my ears. I screamed, covering my ears and bent down on the floor of the vehicle. About 6 or 7 shots fired... then screaming and cursing 10 words a second came from Omar and the 2 men. "FUCKING SHOT MY LEGS YOU FUCKING NO GOOD PIECES OF SHIT, ARGHHH MY FUCKING LEGS HURT LIKE YOU BITCHES..."

"YOU IDIOT START FUCKING CRAWLING BACK TO TREE RIGHT NOW.. MOVE! STOP CRYING LIKE A LITTLE ASS BABY."

I slowly raised my head and saw Omar and the bandit behind him closely. I gasped, blood was smearing on the ground as Omar was crawling towards the tree he told to be, his legs dragging behind. I couldn't watch more...

"Why you shoot him?! Why he try to run?" I asked the driver.

He just answered because he tried to fucking run.

"MY FUCKING LEGS, I'M BLEEDING... HELP!"

I noticed his trousers were staining more in blood, he was bleeding heavily. As Omar dragged to the tree and sat down, the bandit took out big rags, and a syringe containing some morphine, and gave it to Omar.

"Here, now fix your bloody mess up, sit down, and shut up."

Omar continued cursing... as he tightly wrapped the rags tightly around his legs so it stopped bleeding. The ghuillie suit bandit then walked back to the car and told me to get out in a frustrated voice. I jumped out and followed his exact orders. I went to sit beside Omar where he was clenching in pain. I whispered he was okay... but he ignored my question and continue to curse under his breath about the bandits. The driver stood beside the care while the other walked up to us.

"Alright. Now, who owns the car?"

I looked up at him and spoke... "I.. do.. it's my home... my mobile home, my stuff is in there and everything."

He turned towards me then knelled down, concentrated his eyes on me. "Victoria... victoria... where you find it?" His eyes made me afraid... stutter.

"I.. I found it at a small airfield.. I.. don't know which one, it was fixed. I believe it owned from a man that is now dead. I had it for 2 days. My home..."

He stood up then went over to Omar. "Where you find this vehicle?"

Omar spat and spoke in a gruesome voice, "Why should you know you fucking bandits, you have no means for us, we don't know where your fucking bush friend is, so you better fucking turn around.... bush man."

At that moment he switched his rifle up, then took a big swing with his weapon and hit Omar square in the stomach with the butt of the gun. I can hear the thump and Omar clenching. I gasped and covered my face for a moment.

"YOU ANSWER THE QUESTION NOW! OR I SHOOT YOU IN THE FACE, ANSWER!"

At that the cracking of his gun went off again. I went prone and covered my ears, they rang for a few minutes after.

"Get up."

I sat back up and hugged my knees against my chest, shivering. Omar hugged his stomach and bit his lip hard. to me he was very tolerate to pain... he then spoke slowly

"The lady.... victoria... she was driving it around Electrovask and that's where I met her... she said it was her vehicle. Then we started driving yes? Now does that answer your fucking question?"

The bandit didn't answer, then walked back to his partner and started speaking low with him, having their own private conversation. I heard a bit over what they are saying, talking about what they were going to do this us.. then something about a camp. One of the bandits reached in and grabbed two hatchet and walked towards us.

"You two now chop wood, we need this tree chopped down now, for our camp we need wood. Yes? Now start chopping." Now we were their slaves? I didn't understand, I was getting hungry... but ignored it as he dropped the hatchet infront of us. I grabbed one and started hacking at the tree, doing very little damage to the tree since the hatchet is dull. Omar didn't comply,

"How I'm I suppose to fucking get wood with my legs broken you stupid retards?"

"I don't care about your fucking legs, just start chopping the tree down! Now!"

For about a 30 minutes I got into... like what... 3 inches into the huge tree stump? My arm was starting to be soar and my hands was blistering. Omar didn't do much work anyway, his hatchet broke... from swinging to hard. As soon as his broke... my broke... what coincidence. We looked at each other, Omar didn't look so well, he must be in severe pain and white from loss of blood.

The two bandits interrupted. "HEY, WHAT YOU DOING CHOP THAT TREE DOWN!"

Omar spoke, "FUCKING HATCHET BROKEN YOU SEE?! NO HATCHET, NO WOOD."

The one bandit told the other to see if their was another one, they went in the vehicle to look... only finding one and threw it infront of us. I looked at Omar and told I would do it, since he needed rest from the pain. As I started swinging my arms.. the bandits approached Omar, who was standing up now... the morphine must of got rid of the pain.... but it was not good to stand on shooting legs... it can cause permanent damage. They dropped a set of clothes on the ground and told Omar to wear it.

"I'm not fucking wearing any of your shit."

"Do you want me to break your legs again? I don't have anymore morphine."

Omar growled and grabbed the clothes, telling them he's changing behind a tree. The bandits were watching him closely, but by seeing his movements it seemed like he was trying to hide something. I continued swinging as he came back, wearing a white shirt and green shorts. He looked like a man going on vacation. The writing in the back of the shirt was some funny quote I didn't remember.

"I look like a fucking idiot."

The bandits laughed, "Now that looks much better, now if you excuse us."

The two bandits went over to the vehicle, having their private conversation about us again, but I couldn't hear all of it. Omar went behind the tree I was chopping.

"Hey, what are you doin..." I stopped speaking as I saw a machete come from under his shirt on the back.

"Shhhh... Victoria... Victoria.... I'm going to jump on them okay? You come with me with hatchet and we kill them okay? Then we are free. They are not looking... so we go now yes?"

I shook my head, is he nuts?! "No.. Omar... don't do this... your going to get shot."

"Victoria... Victoria... I have to do this okay? Ready? Go."

At that point I couldn't stop him, he started running towards them closing in fast with the machete in the air.... it all happened so fast. Omar screamed a word before the bandits turned to see him. Before he can even get too close, the bandits screamed and raised their guns with the cracking sounds of gunshots.... before I knew I was doing I was laying on the ground.... helpless...

..........always run........always move.........

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Journal #7 - Lost to belong

You know that thought you got shot is so strong that you actually think you were shot and freak out? I did, but I soon as I heard voices, I knew I was still alive.

My ears continue to ring for minutes...... for first thought I was dead... I thought they will shoot me... or will, maybe they will. I had to get up.. I heard yelling in the distance, it was hard to hear because the ringing sounds in my ears from the many machine gunshots.

Finally it stopped, I slowly raised my head and released my pressured hands on my ears. I looked up, the two men were still standing over at the vehicle, looking down at what is now the dead body of Omar. There was soo much blood... so much that almost a small tiny stream of it started to make a path down the slightly tilted elevation. I laid here prone very still and horrified. Then the two men looked up at me... one started stomping fast towards me with the gun drawn to me. I sat up and started arse dragging backwards with my feet kicking the dirt, trying to avoid the bandit getting too close to me. While he got close enough that he was standing over me with the gun barrel very close to my body, I fell over to my back. He spoke in a booming voice,

"WAS THIS A COORDINATED ATTACK? HUH? DID YOU TWO PLAN THIS OUT? LOOK WHAT YOU DID NOW!"

I cowered, putting my arms up in defense and curled my legs.

"NO, NO... PLEASE IT WAS HIM... he...... told me he was going to attack... I said no.. I said don't do it, but he did anyway. I'm sorry! He... he was crazy when I first met him"

Even when I was blocking some of my vision of the gun barrel, I can still see it very close. He stood there still, breathing heavily... it was all silenced for a moment, until he stepped back one and raised his leg... ready to kick,

"GAWD FUCKIN DAMIT!" he yelled while about to kick...

I first thought he would kick me but just missed by a inch.. kicking the dirt and making dust. I just froze in a defensive position, all curled and using my arms and legs to block from any hits. I can hear the bandit stomping back to the vehicle where his friend is. I slowly uncurled myself then sat back up, sitting down and brushing the dirt off myself. I put my knees against my chest and set my chin on my knees, trying to listen to the conversation and being afraid. I can see the angry look in their faces. They were talking about me, but I couldn't catch the words they thought of. I didn't dare to move a inch.

After a few minutes, watching their facial expressions, it seemed like they calmed a bit. The partner went on and jumped in the driver seat, while the ghuillie suit man barked orders at me,

"Victoria get in vehicle now, you touch anything, you get shot."

I slowly got up, walking to the vehicle and jumping in the back seat farthest from the equipment, the driver started the engine and the vehicle moved. I focused myself trying to keep out of stress and emotions... I kept my face down to the ground.

"Victoria Victoria.... I'm sure now you are with him and a group yes, now look what you done... now we are afraid. Now, answer this, are you in a a group?"

I shook my head...

"No... no... I didn't even know there are groups here, how many are there? Yes... I met one group but I didn't know... I didn't know okay? I... just want my home back please.... my car."

"Who was this group you speak of?"

I didn't want to refresh my memories... but I remember the URAL well...

"It was group of... 6 men.... Russian accents and in a URAL... they only asked for my name and that is it okay? I don't know... whats going on on this land okay?"

The passenger nodded his head... "ah yes... I know of them, good group yes.. good men too."

I nodded as well... maybe I can build a rapport, but the subject changed dramatically.... when the driver spoke...

"Now Victoria... here is what going to happen. We drop you off, and we disappear, never hear from us again okay? We were going to equip you.... recruit us to our group if you would cooperated. We believed your story.... but what the stupid man did was a stupid move... and now.... we don't trust you... so are best decision was to leave you."

I shook my head.. no... I didn't want to lose my vehicle... it was like my best friend, my home.... I spoke softly..

"But... but... my home, I... all I want is my home I will leave yes? Please.... don't take my home......"

Their was silence... but firm voices stood still...

"I'm sorry it has to come to this Victoria... we will give you gear... and drop you off near Electro.... then you never hear from us again... okay?"

I couldn't say more, I kept my head down.

After a short drive the vehicle stopped. The passenger grabbed the rifle I was carrying, a couple bottles of water, three cans of food and set it down several meters in front of the vehicle. He came back telling me more orders...

"Now, you go... take your stuff, and go to Electro never turn back okay? I am sorry... this is how it has to go.."

Without anymore energy left to argue, I jumped out. They went back in, started the vehicle, and quickly drove off the opposite way. I watched as my home disappeared into the woods. I didn't know what was worse, losing a friend that lost your vehicle, or losing my home only. I don't know how I get so attached to things... I guess it's the new norm in survival.

I took a deep breath.... trying to push back memories and picked up the rifle. I put the ammunition in my jacket zip pockets.. since they left me with no backpack. I slinged the rifle over me so I can use my arms to carry the food and water. The sun shined down on me... just perfect temperature.... I can see the city they were speaking about.. Electro..... I thought popped in my head. I set down my belongings and open the map Omar gave me from my pocket. I try to study the names... and pointed at the city I believed what is near me. Electro.... I looked at the map and saw the word closely spelled 'Berezino.' Between the two cities was far..... but I now know what my next goal will be..... find the survival camp. I'm thinking it will be a all day walk... and a all night. So I picked up my belongings, slinged my rifle, and headed towards the city Electro.

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Thanks, ya I moved the standalone to the other lore thread for standalone. It sad :( I have a lot to write though

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Journal #8 - Long trip... literally

I decided to skim the city... since I it was difficult to handle the rifle while carrying food and drinks. I was lucky in once house I found... a travelers backpack that was able to carry my food.. then continued on.

Following the main highway.. you can get bored very easily. I was used to the awkward silence now... where we used to always here something in our ears, and now we only hear the natural sounds of the earth. I whistled sometimes... sing out-loud.. heck, their was nothing to be embarrassed about. I would jog, mostly walk, then rest. I'm guessing it's been hours..... long hours. I carefully made sure that I rationed my food and water long enough to last the trip until the survival camp I have heard about, if it was true, I'm guessing my new home would be there.

Hours of walking, I came across another town I wasn't aware of. I checked my map and look for the town name that matched on the map. Not sure how to say it, but it was the second last town before heading to the survival camp. I came long ways....

The town is fairly nice.... I could imagine what it was like before the end of the world. There was a small hospital, a small market, and a pile of houses. I decided to stop and look around, maybe I would find something.

I was walking down a street when I heard a high pitch voice... more like some kind of Chinese or Japanese voice,

"Helloooo! Helllooo!"

I stopped walking and turned around... I didn't feel like being hostile... even though last encounter wasn't very good. I spotted a man in military clothing but in a different pattern. He also wore funky sunglasses and a black beret. I guess he was part of a group well, but as quickly scanning the area, I didn't see anyone else. He walked and approach me closer then spoke.

"Hellloooo, how are you? My name is [gawd dam I so forget names..."] and you are?"

His voice was hilarious. I smiled a bit trying not a giggle...

"Victoria is me..... how are you?"

"I am okayyyyy, just looking arounddddd"

I nodded.. maybe he can help me...

"Um yes... I got a question... you know this survival camp near Bere...zino? I have heard of it and on the look for it."

The man nodded his head...

"Ahaaaa ah yes.. Solace yes.. it is that way... not too far from here yes, I take you there. You are nice lady, I was going to go there myself you knoww.. ahhhh watch out!"

I haven't been paying attention, but a undead creature growled right behind me. I quickly turned and sidestepped from the undead's drunk looking attack, swinging full force with his arms at me. Just as I side stepped, the Japanese man shot the undead in the face... making it fall beside my fault.

"Oh.. thank you... "

"Ahyour welcome, but we should go now.. loud noises make more come, come on."

From previous events, I was is the 'don't care' mood, which trusting this guy of course was a bad idea but hey, it he is actually going where I think we are then I'll take the chance.

Until dusk, we stopped at a couple of remote villages, not having much trouble with the undead, he would just normally shoot them, which I find why...? it will attract more of the undead. I was still using my bloody hatchet of course, it was the only thing I got handled of. I would only use my rifle if I need it in emergency.

This Japanese guy was funny.... kept me entertained while he spoke many stories of his life. I kind of kept quiet this time, I hate repeating my story. This is the time when I first saw a animal as well, on the trip there we found a skinny goat in the forest, wandering around. I quickly told him I will kill it, to not attract the undead. Raising my hatchet, I slowly crouch walked to the goat.. who was looking away... but when I got too close, the goat startled and started to run. I was gonna start sprinting as well, until I heard a shot, then the goat was down. I knew it was him that shot, but I turned around putting my hands on my hips.....

"I had it you know.... "

"It was running, they run too fast you know, haha"

I shook my head face-palming, then looked down at the goat. It was dead alright, I shot in the neck. I grabbed the hunting knife out of my boot and started skinning the goat while he watched for any undead that will come running. It was a dam skinny goat... and very difficult to cut, but I managed to get three chunks of meat out of the goat. I stood up, wiping small sweat off my forehead with my forearm. My hands were bloody.. I wanted to wash it off a nearby pond.

"Can you carry the meat?"

He went over, looking down at the carcass.

"Ah yes, I can cook at camp.. they have fire. I am a good cook."

We went over to a pond to wash up before heading to camp, which was getting very close by. Darkness was pouring upon the land, which in the distance I can see burning barrels near the dirt road.

"See those barrels? They lead towards the camp, this dirt road leads up to biggg hill, and open clearance to the camp."

I nodded, we followed the burning barrels. The walk was tiring and my legs were very sore from walking all day. I couldn't wait to just sit down and relax... maybe sleep for once without the worried of the undead biting my arm off in the morning.

As we got to the top of the hill, I can see the outside structure of the camp, it was well lit up as well by campfires. The outside structure of the camp was made by old buildings and built up walls of metal, bricks, and train boxes. It was not too big, but fair enough. Infront was a vehicle roadblock gate, and two sheets of metal that opens and closes. On the right side was a huge metal cylinder structure, where people walk in and out of. Around the boundaries was metal wires with spikes... well fortified place.

He already ran into the tunnel when I stopped for a moment. We can just go right in? I looked at a couple men in black hoodies and rifles. They looked to be the guards of the camp.. or something like that. They nodded as I slowly made in the tunnel.

In the inside amazing how they set up. They have a few tents, campfires, pillows, buildings to store things, and another area in the back where it is shut off to limits. There were several people walking around. Some in green fatigues and some in those black hoodies.

I yawned as a scanned the area and said hello to a couple of people who walked by. I didn't feel like talking much, the Japanese guy just went off running and talking to people, like he knew them already. I just sat down infront of the campfire to warm up, I didn't really feel like moving anymore. It felt good to relax finally.

I opened my journal and started writing, until I heard some argument near the second gate inside the camp. It seemed like the man I was with is trying to bribe the guards into going in the back of the camp where there are doors. He tried to give some kind of creme cake to get in the back. Another man beside him, seem to be his friend, was trying to get in as well.

"You know if you keep harassing us you won't be well welcomed here anymore for awhile."

The Japanese guy seemed shocked and followed the man in green fatigues near me, it seemed like he was trying to ignore him, but the Japanese guy continue to follow liek a stray dog.

"I'm not harassing, I just giving you creme cake, I give cake, you let me in back of camp okay? It is a good deal! I am sure you let other people in there as well."

"And I'm sure I won't let you in for awhile if you keep making me upset." The man grumbled.

He stopped at the campfire I sat at and turned to look at me. I didn't look up, I just saw in the corner of my eye.

"Okay okay, I made you upset." My so called Japan friend looked at me as well, then went off to the gate again with his friend, talking to more people who seem to be guarding the gate. What made him so addicted to get in the back of the gate? I was distracted when the man in fatigues spoke to me.

" You seem someone I haven't seen before, what's your name?" His voice still seemed a little upset, so I complied by closing my journal and looking up at him.

"Victoria McCloud.... it's... yes I never been here before, that guy with the Japan accent showed me this place.... but it seemed to be bothering you now, I don't like that." I kept my voice low enough so he wouldn't overhear me.

The man in fatigues gave me a long stare, trying to read me or something, I couldn't tell if he was smiling or not... he was wearing a bandanna over half his face.

"Well then Victoria, welcome to Solace. You are welcome here , but your friend seemed to be a bit trouble to us... and I'm not sure how you are so as long as there is no trouble we are fine here."

I immediately went into defence.

"Oh, I don't know if he's a friend yet, he just helped me get here. When I first land ashore on this land... I heard about this camp, and needed directions getting here. He showed me.... but I never knew he was this annoying. Why is he at that gate anyway?"

He turned to look at the Japanese friend then back at me.

"Ah yes... that is our.. stash will you say, we control it as the camp representatives.. so the camp doesn't fall into corruption..... it's only for certain people who protect this camp from anyone who is against it."

I looked at the man with weary, but worried eyes. I didn't want more fighting..... or anything to do with trouble... I was tired, scared, emotional, and just.... done. I wanted to relax for once. I asked,

"People attack this camp? Why?"

"There are people out here, who go against our wishes. We welcome all survivors who follow common rules... you know simple things. We let them stay or go as they wish... we supply things sometimes... but sometimes it is up to you to survive. These men... who attack us.. they believe in power.. having complete control on all supplies and people. They want to be in control... be the new 'government' I guess."

I shook my head and stood up...

"Government? Over what? We live in civilization that's barely alive anymore. We don't need control, only survival and sharing... so we all can... re-produce and rebuild our lives. If they do this... there will be nothing left to rule."

He nodded in agreement,

"Ya, this rock is stupid shit... but it is what it is."

He then walked away slowly, going towards the loud argument towards the south gate where the Japanese man and his friend was still talking to the guards. It was fully dark, and I decided to find a place to sleep. I found a tent nearby, a medical one and layed in a unoccupied bed.

When laying here before passing out, I thought of all what happened and put it in the back of my mind. This was survival, and I will live as long as I can no matter what happens. I'm thinking I might help find supplies for this camp, so we can survive as long as possible. It will be a challenge.

.........always run.........always move..

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Journal #9 - Taking a walk

A final good night sleep came across me... but I still fear of the nightmares that crawl in my sleep... I did suffer from some.. but still I finally had a stage of good sleep.

I woke up by loud voices and the sun shining on my face. I didn't know what time it was, but I knew it was late afternoon according to the sun. I stretched and walked outside... noticing a couple new faces in the camp. Still, there was the black hooded people walking around with weary but watchful eyes. The Japanese man was talking still... I didn't catch any words until I heard a man spoke,

"So, you killed a man to get his clothes? That is so wrong... you know that right?"

"No, it is not wrong, you have to kill to survive right? He had what I wanted yes, I was cold."

Really.. did I just travel with a man that shot someone to take clothes? I walked up to the conversation,

"But you took a dead man's clothes...... stripped his body naked. That is just weird dude."

I put my hands on my hips... I couldn't believe it...so I spoke,

"Wait, you took a dead man's clothes? You know how disgusting that is?!"

He looked at me with a smile,

"It is not... it is survival you know, like trying to get any other thing you need, I wanted his clothes.. so I shot him."

I never going to travel with this man again... then I remembered how hungry I was. I had one can of pasta left... but I didn't want to eat that stuff, I knew he had the cooked goat on him. so I asked,

"Hey, remember that goat we killed? You said you would cook it, did you?"

He nodded,

"Yes yes I cooked themmm.."

I waited for him to give some but asked anyway,

"Soooo, can you give me some?"

He shook his head,

"Nooo they are all mine now, you get none."

I opened my mouth in disbelief.... did he just rob from me?! It was our kill, not his.

"What?! You share some of that right now...... don't do this to me.. it was our kill! Now give some now!"

The men standing around were just standing there watching, one of them spoke..

"Stealing from a woman? Dude now you just crossed the line..."

"I did not steal, it was my kill, my meat. You get none Victoria. haha.. " then he suddenly spat on me... the spit landed near my shoulder.

With no control over myself or even thinking... I raised my left hand and dead on, slapped him on the cheek hard... even his face moved to the right a little. I didn't even want to talk anymore, so I walked away. I could hear the sudden reaction from the people around me, and then mumurs. What a idiot I was... or he is...

I stood in one of the corners of the camp... trying to hold my emotions back, I was clenching my rifle tightly until my hands sweat. One of the men that was around in the conversation approached me.

"Hey Miss.. you okay?"

I nodded and looked away.

"Ya.. just what kind of person is he? Like... he's funny but very very cruel. He did showed me the way to this camp when I was lost... but now this? Really?"

He looked at me, then back at the group.

"Ya.. I wouldn't be running around with a guy that kills people for clothes, I wouldn't trust him one bit."

I agreed, I didn't want to be around him for much longer... I would decide to go somewhere. Reaching in the back of my pocket I pulled out the map.. and walked towards the man.

"Um... I don't know this language well.. but can you show me where we are? Then if I go outside.. where are the places around here?"

He looked down at the map, started to point places.. I interrupted and gave him the pen I use to write my journal.

"Here.... is where we are.. Klem Hill. To the southwest is Berezino... to the north that city... then the airfield just north of that. To the east is small villages, to the west.. not much but if you follow the highway you go to the big town Gorka. I recommend be highly careful... there are bandits out there who will rob around this area..."

That town Gorka crossed my mind... reminded me of Omar... his death... my capture... I shook my head trying to forget those memories. I smiled and folded the map up.

"Thank you sir..... I will be careful."

He nodded and went back to the small group speaking. I walked around... studying the map with good photographic memory. I then ran into two people who spoke a greeting.

"Hello.. sorry I was just.. looking on my map." I put it away quickly. A man in a black hoodie and another man in green fatigues... well.. mostly everyone was in green fatigues but in different styles.

"What is your name miss?"

"Uh.. Victoria McCloud."

"ID?" He extended his hand and waited. I was confused for a moment, just looking at the man,

"What... ID? Why?"

The man beside him spoke...

"It's just something to prove your name... to prove who you are... it could be anything from dogtags to licence."

I try to think.... did I had any licence before...... shit happened. I took off my backpack and looked. Here, I was able to find my old fishing licence that is out of date because of the outbreak. It had my first and last name... but no picture. I put the licence on the man's hand.

"Sorry... it's all I have... on me before, things happen."

The man gave my licence back, nodding, while the man in fatigues spoke...

"Ya.. I can't believe I ended up on the gawd forsaken rock."

I looked down not answering to that.. but said I was on my way for a walk, and headed outside.

Once I stood outside I looked at the sun to see the direction I was going.. I decided to head north... where he said something about a airfield. Usually I had good luck there, so I went on my way.

Just before I started to walk down the hill, a rumbling engine came form the distance. It was a ural... the same ural I saw days before. I stopped for a moment to see how many people there were. There were several, and I didn't want to know what was going to happen so I started running down the hill to avoid contact.

It was a nice day... but I forgot to eat before travelling and I felt lightheaded. I decided to stop at a remote ranch house where I found a pumping well that had some water. I sat down... taking my hatchet out and carefully trying to cut a slit in the top of the can. I was able to open it, very close to cutting my hand though. The unpleasant look of canned macaroni looked like chicken in my hungry eyes.

I forced the disgusting macaroni down and washed it out with some water from the well, then made my way to the airfield which was a few 100 meters out.

When I arrived there, there were decaying bodies of soldiers, wrecked vehicles, and empty buildings. Of course, no sign of life. I sighed, lifted myself straight up, checked my rifle then headed to look into buildings around the area.

I know this is helpful.. but depressing. Seeing no life... and destruction is something I gotta get used to. I trudged around the area, lifted shelves, chairs, looking in containers. There was barely anything to look at. I was able to find a few of those military instant meals, and a canteen I can fill up at the well every time I walk out of the camp. At this rate finding food, we wouldn't be able to survive long. We would have to start fishing, hunt animal which there is not much of, or start to gut the undead creatures, risking to get poisoned. There was a couple rounds empty clips for my rifle, maybe if I found unused bullets I can fill these with ammunition rounds.

After a couple hours of searching, I was able to find a few units of food, and able to fill one ammunition clip for my rifle. For once I was happy I was in military training, because I knew what bullets fit what ammunition box. I didn't have much trouble with the undead... they were slow, and all I had to do is stay out of their sight and stay quiet.

It was getting dark and I wanted to head back to camp before nightfall. Walking towards some trees, I suddenly stubbed my tow and tripped and fell. Pain struck me as I landed hard on my left shoulder..... I yelled in pain. All that weight from my backpack and falling of gravity severely hurt my shoulder. I laid there for a moment, rolling on my back. My vision was blurring for a moment as I thought I would pass out from the pain. But I try to have no tolerance on it... for I heard a growling of a undead not too far away. I try to get up, using my right arm to pull all the weight. I fell from balance.... and there I saw the undead closing in fast infront of me. With adrenaline, I got up again. Standing up, I quickly grabbed my hatchet that was hooked to my belt for my jeans. As it just got close enough, I swung my hatchet down, as always, hitting in the head.

I caught my breath as the adrenaline settled down. That's when pain on my shoulder started to throb.. I didn't know what was wrong with it, hopefully that I didn't fracture or dislocated it. I then remember what happened, and looked what I tripped on. It was a well flatted tire.... laying in the long grass I was walking in. I inspected it... it seemed to be a universal tire for vehicles. Something made me say I wanted to bring this back to camp. But for this, it's going to be difficult.

It took hours... but I was slowly rolling the tire with my right arm and balancing it with my left arm. I couldn't use my left arm much, because my shoulder was killing me literally. As I came slowly closer to the gate... which was open, the guards stared at me... like I was some kind of odd person rolling a tire around. I was actually really excited to finally come back to the camp in one piece.

"Hey, everyone, look what I found!" as I dropped the tire on the ground, and the dust swirled in the air as I dropped it. The camp suddenly went silence for a moment, all eyes on me. A couple of new faces walked toward me and looked at the tire.

"Well, then that is a good catch, and you are.....?"

"Victoria" I turned and looked at a man who looked sketchy. He was wearing a skull printed bandanna, and was crossing his arms. He nodded at my name and walked away. What I weird person. I turned to see a man looking at a red emergency van... it looked to be a medical one. I then remember the small can of half fuel I had in my pack, I took my pack off and took out the can. I slowly approached the man who was studying the vehicle, it seemed to me he was checking all the equipment that was inside. What caught to me is the black beret he had... I think...

"um... may I put some fuel in your vehicle? I have a small jug here, and I don't have a vehicle... so..."

He didn't even look at me, and was still rummaging through the equipment.

"Ya.. go ahead."

I looked for the gas lid and carefully opened it, then pour the contents in the vehicle with only my right arm. After I was done I set the empty jug beside him, then grabbed the tire and rolled it towards him... he didn't look up once until he noticed the tire that I dropped beside him.

"I uh... you can have the tire too...."

He then finally looked at me, he smiled under his bandanna... it seemed everyone was wearing bandannas.

"Why thank you... miss....."

"Vicotira McCloud."

"ah, Victoria yes... you know you are a very nice woman, come here... you can take whatever you need in our vehicle. We don't usually do this but... you are a good deed to us." He had a accent as well... probably Russian as well.

I looked at him and thought he was joking, but he kept the back doors open for me to look at while he put the tire in the back seat floors. I carefully started to touch the equipment, looking through what they had. The man came back and helped me look.

"You see Victoria, we have lots, it's okay."

The vehicle was full of weapons... about 7 of them and ammunition, they also had some parts and what not for the vehicle.. but I shook my head. I had my gun.. that I barely use and 2 clips of 60 shots. I was satisfied... and hoped they had food and water instead, but I guess they had it on themselves.

"I'm okay... thank you though."

I then went over the front of the vehicle and noticed bullet like holes in the driver window... I was presuming they shot the driver and stole it... so I asked.

"um.. what happened to the window? Did you get hurt?" I also noticed the windshield was missing... "Where is all the glass?"

The man walked over and stuttered his words..

"Oh uh... oh yes... ah a tree branch poked through the window you see... the windshield was missing in the first place we found it yes... I remember... no one got hurt."

I nodded slowly... probably a lie....

"uh.. come meet my friend" He lured me towards a man who was leaning against a wall near the front gate.

"ah.. hey, this is Victoria.. she helped us yes."

"Yes.. I saw it all... you are in our debt Victoria.. but it looks to be you are fine. You did a good deed for us."

I nodded.. didn't want to speak much.

"Ya I..... decided to start scavenging for the camp.. help people.. I like helping people."

He looked at me with a stare..

"Well, that is a grateful thing.. but just be careful alright?"

Agreed to, I excused myself and went over to the campfire to warm up from the dropping temperatures of the night. I decided to sleep for the night... maybe just stay in the camp the next day. For the rest of the evening I was writing my journal... telling my story how I got here to a couple a people that I greeted to, then went to sleep... holding my rifle close to my body and hoping I can sleep off the pain on my shoulder.

........always run..........always move....

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Matt    21

Great stories keep up the writing maybe I will come across you in game one day :)

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Vanu    0

Thanks ya, I wish people continue in Arma 2 but I guess everyone moved to the standalone, which I have complete trouble starting out with since the update.

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Vanu    0

Journal #10 - Jason + Sam

Dreams were filling my head, of wandering in the darkness. Only darkness were in my eyes then I would panic. After I panic, I would start getting hit from unknown people or items until I fall to the ground and get beaten repeatedly until I wake up...

I jolted.. sat up awake. Pain throbbed in my left shoulder as I grabbed it immediately to try to avoid the pain. I massaged it... which didn't help. I bit my lip to try to tolerate it. I laid back down slowly... waiting until the pain eased a bit. I must of rolled around the bed and leaned against my shoulder, because my gun fell off the bed. I leaned over to pick it up, I was happy that no one has stolen anything off me, because my backpack was untouched as well. Probably the guards watch if there are any thieves anyway.

After laying for a few minutes, the pain eased a bit but I remembered the pain killers I have found back in Electro. I shuffled in my pack, finding a bottle. I didn't understand what it was, but by the looks of the picture on the box.. I would take the chance. I popped one white pill and took a swing of my water.

I sat up stretching, checking my rifle and slinged my back on carefully, leaving the left strap off for awhile until the supposed pain killers kicked in. I went outside and the early afternoon sun shined. There were again, new faces in the area. The only men I noticed was the block hooded guards and the man with the white skull printed bandanna. I walked around taking a note of each person, then stood in one spot.

One man approached me. He was wearing a cowboy looking hat, a dark colored bandanna, and green fatigues with combat boots. I noticed he looked... different from others, but his eyes were focused on me with a smile under that bandanna. His fingers were tapping his gun, like he was anxious.

"Hello Miss..... what is your name?" He had a Italian accent... really different from most of the Russians here.

"Victoria McCloud" I smiled back.

There was a awkward silence for a moment. He was looking down, then back up at me, seemed like he was hesitated to say something. Until he spoke,

"Your the most... beautiful woman I have ever seen..."

Now I at this point I can freak out.... or just keep my cool. I'm guessing in the state where there is barely no woman to look at anymore. Typical men were used to seeing the female population 24/7... now it must be difficult to even remember what a beautiful woman looked like. I wasn't interested in relationships... only surviving... which reminded me of Ty now my only friend. I guess I didn't give up yet that he was dead, that he was still out there somewhere. I know when I see him. I breathed in... careful what to say to the gentleman,

"uh... thank you, but... I don't think I look that pretty.... I'm sure we all never had a proper shower in a long time."

Shit... well I tried.. that was a stupid comment. Which reminded me what I did look like... I never looked in a mirror for days. I could imagine my dirty face, unruly hair [which is why I wear a hat] and how much dirt can be washed off. I mean.. I do quick washes in ponds.. but it is not fresh water. The man spoke standing closer to me,

"No.. you are beautiful Victoria, just like your name..... stunning."

Sheesh... he is trying... I mean, I get the whole surviving/rebuilding civilization, but I'm not volunteering for that. I rather die alone... because I am already hurt from losing someone very important to me.

"Well, I'm sure there is other woman out there that are much better looking then me."

That is true what I said... but, I haven't saw other woman yet [spoiler alert].

He reached for my hand.. which was unexpected.. I can feel the embarrassment watchful eyes around the camp... I was feeling a bit uncomfortable. Suddenly he started light kissing on my hand, then going up my arm. I reacted quickly and slashed my hand back, almost hitting the man's face.

"What.. what are you doing?!" I stepped back even more, replacing my hands on my rifle and looking at him with disbelief. He was looking back at me, then down at the ground in embarrassment.

"I... I am sorry.. I was stupid. It is a.. showing of greeting in my country.. I come from Italy." Well that explains everything....

"Oh.. well, you scared me... sir... I now understand it is your culture how you greet people yes?"

I learned I little bit of culture during highschool, that some kiss people to say hello. He nodded and spoke,

"Yes... Victoria.. forgive me of my actions. You want to sit down near the fire and relax?"

I nodded and went over to the campfire and sat down just a comfortable ways from the man, not too close. He sat down, then thought of something that went from his mind.

"Ah.. where are my manners, my name is Jason. I am terribly sorry what I did back there, it was idiot of me. I should of known."

Ya.. I accepted the apology and smiled, I understand how cultures are. But he continued on,

"But you are the most beautiful woman you know, I seen other and you are just the best of them."

I kind of ignored the comment, even though it was nice. So there was other woman. I wonder who they are and what they do. It would be nice to talk to them instead of these men all the time. Jason then reached for his pocket and pulled out a cigarette package and a lighter. He then took one unit out, light it up, then puffed out some smoke from his mouth, letting the smoke float neatly into the air. He spoke again after a second puff.

"So.. what brings you here?"

Well.. that's when I told my story all over again. He smiled in the end, looking at his cigarette reminded me of founding I couple packages. I slinged my backpack off, and rummaged through it.

"Hey um... I found these while going for a walk, you want them?" I took out two big boxes of cigarettes.. and extended my arm to him.

He looked at it and took it willfully.

"Why thank you Victoria.... your beautiful and very nice. I like that your the nicest in the camp." I still didn't like being called beautiful.

"Ya.. I just go around helping people, it is what I do Jason." He smiled again, I can feel the stare through his sunglasses at me. I can tell how men are.

I then took attention to a man who came walking towards us, he had green hunting hoodie, blue pants, black bandanna, and dark sunglasses. He spoke,

"Why hello there, how are you guys? What is your name miss?"

"Victoria.." I can see that suddenly the emotion in Jason changed, he bit hi cigarette too tight, then grabbed it and threw it aggressively at the fire.

"Victoria.. I see. I was wondering, I protect people in this camp... and was curious if I can speak to you privately Victoria, I wanted to.. tell you of some things."

I was confused, but then Jason stood up and went toe to toe with the man.

"Why don't you leave us alone. She is fine, she doesn't need to talk to YOU especially. She doesn't need protection, she is fine here." He then turned to me. "Victoria... don't go with this man, you don't have to."

I was exchanging looks between the two... confused. I spoke directly to the man in green.

"What... why you have to talk to me though personally? Are you a camp representative?"

He glared at Jason, but looked back at me.

"For protection duties... that's all I can say. It will just be a few minutes. I am not a representative... but we were 'hired' to protect this camp."

Jason had his fists clenched.

"Listen here, she is NOT going, she doesn't need to. You are not protecting this camp.. we are! We are under contract see?" He pulled out a piece of paper in handwriting and showed it to the man.

He looked at it for a second then raised his voice at Jason.

"The lady get's to choose if she goes with me or not, it is her decision, not ours! And for the record, we were contracted as well. Now Victoria, it is up to you if you want to talk, are you coming or not?"

I didn't know what to think... then I had a smart question. Being alone with someone to talk to could be a trap. So I asked a smart question.

"If I come talk to you... where will we talk?"

He thought for a moment, Jason looked at me with determined eyes.

"It will be outside the camp, just to be safe about it... I won't have my weapon with me, I'll put it away. I'll be unarmed."

I can see Jason in the corner of my eye while I tried to study this man shake his head slightly. I didn't trust him, he might have friends that will silently jump on me and take me captive in silence while the camp won't hear a sound.

"I will think about it... but for now I'm going to stay here and relax, okay?"

His reaction was a slight glare, but his eyes suddenly shifted to Jason. I can feel the tensing up between the two men, where they both trying to protect me? It was hard who to trust... or to just trust nobody. In the end, I wanted to just sit in camp.

"Alright Victoria, but I'll still be around in case you change your mind." He then turned around and left. Jason watched him leave then sat down. Jason then whispered in the low voice..

"Victoria... don't go with him, do not trust him okay? Promise me that?"

I nodded without question, it seemed reasonable.

We then started talking about more about ourselves, Jason pulled out another smoke until a man I seen before stood over him, he extended his arm, like he wanted something. Jason rolled his eyes.. then handed him a cigarette to have.

"Victoria, I like you to meet my 'brother' I call, Sam. He is my second man, good protector as well. He will protect you whenever trouble comes."

I nodded a greeting, he did as well. It was the same man with the white skull bandanna and cowboy hat I saw earlier.

It was later afternoon and a few more people joined in our conversation around the fire, we talked about the state we are living in now... how it is so different how things change from comfortable life to camping as a everyday life. I built friendship with a few people, especially Jason, but... I always have that trust issue in the back in my head. But throughout our conversation, we started hearing shots being heard in the north. It was excessive to zombie killing, someone reported back what was going on. There was rumors in the camp that a fight was going on not too far from here, and it was not safe to leave the area yet.

Things got quiet when the hunter hoodie man came again to bother Jason, he wanted to talk to him about the camp, he also apologized for harassing him.

"Jeez can I not be bothered at least for one day?" Jason then stood up.

"Listen Jason, it is important.. you want to protect the lady right?"

He exchanged looks between me and the man.

"Alright, let's talk."

They went over to a corner of a camp. I wanted to what's going on, why I am involved in protecting. I try to listen, only catching words like, "you bring her over here.... we have to be watchful..... protect her at all costs....."

He then walked back after a speech, and sat down with weary, worried, eyes. I dared to ask...

"What's going on?"

He did a reading look at me, he knew I wouldn't give up on this topic.

"This camp... might not be safe for long, there are a bad group nearby... they might attack us. It depends what will happen in the outcome of the fight, they were intercepted by another group when they were going to attack us surprisingly. We might not be safe for very long." and... cliffhanger

......always run... always move....

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Matt    21

Yet another good read wish I could find these folks in game but thats what happens when you seclude yourself in a abandoned hotel but keep up the stories always good to read in my spare time.

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Vanu    0

thanks... very seldom I keep writing but I try to find the time xD Sam, are you the one with the black bandanna and white skull?! :o I keep forgetting names!

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Vanu    0

Yea im cowby hat and black skull mask the one who helped show you how to shoot

Aha....! I knew it >.>

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spartan119    1

Yea im cowby hat and black skull mask the one who helped show you how to shoot

Aha....! I knew it >.>

was good roleplay with you

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Vanu    0

Journal #11 - Men...

I shook my head in disbelief.... this can't be happening... this can't be.. my breaths were quickening and was panicking. I stared at the fire... trying to slow my breaths... I know Jason was watching me, his watching made me calm down eventually.

"What you want me to do?" I asked that because they were speaking about me, trying to keep my mind off of the camp in danger.

"If things... get bad.. I will protect you and escort you to a safe place until things get safe. It is my and Sam's duty now."

I couldn't speak, I just sat quietly. I looked down at my AK-107.. making sure it will work. I knew how to shoot, but I didn't know how to maintain the gun.

"Can you check, to make sure this works?"

He looked down at the gun.

"Ya.. I will get Sam to do it." Sam came over and told me to put the weapon down.

I put it down with the mags. He then started taking the gun apart, then back together, inspecting different parts and what not. After he put the magazine back in, he clipped it unsafe and handed it to me.

"It's ready to fire."

"Thanks you..." I looked at the rifle the way it was before. These two guys were very helpful.

I sat back down with Jason and smiled, he smiled back. Looking around the camp, I noticed a lot of tension going on, especially from the men who were contracted to protect it. Everyone seemed... happy, but I can feel the sadness hiding in them. Everyone was giving last goodbyes... praying, checking their weapons, this almost made me tear up.. but I held it back, keeping my hopes and courage up.

I kept hearing gunshots in the distance, it sounded like it was coming closer every 5 minutes. Sam just stood in the background, his arms crossed as usual.

"If we do get attacked.... who do I shoot... how I know who? Everyone looks familiar." I looked around the camp and scanning at people. Jason spoke,

"I have never seen the group before, they are bad Russians. All I know they wear red berets."

I kept that in my mine... shoot anyone wearing red berets.

"I.. don't know how to properly use this rifle..." of course I said that out of the blue. Sam and Jason both raised their eyebrows... I felt embarrassed. I mean... I know how to shoot, but not this particular kind of rifle. I wanted to make sure I get the right shot when trouble happens.

"We can try out the range..." Jason stood up and spoke.

I looked up at him.. I guess it's worth a try.

We walked out of the camp, which I was worried about. I didn't speak about why we left and how dangerous it was to be outside the camp. What I noticed though, is that the gunshots to the north was awkwardly silent. Jason stopped beside a mat on the ground, built by a hump of dirt. About 30 meters away was targets on hay-bales and leaning against huge train boxes.

"Alright, now lay down on the mat, and aim your gun at the targets. We will give you any tips on how your aiming is."

I looked at the mat, proning position with a rifle was the easiest way to shoot in the training I was in. I gracefully laid down and properly put the gun against my shoulder, resting my elbows comfortably on the ground.

"That is good, make sure that little iron point is at the target, and your gun is kept steady, any tips you have partner?"

Sam crossed his arms studying me,

"Just that it might hurt first time you shoot, that AK got some really kick to it."

I nodded, staring at the targets. Suddenly, Jason and Sam took positions with their weapons and started shooting a couple bullets at the targets. I was now distracted and couldn't fire... not sure why. I try to take a few breaths before shooting, until Jason interrupted,

"Go on.."

I took a deep breath....

The next thing I know my shoulder pierced and I could hear a clink on the target. It meant I hit it... but I saw the spark.. it was not a head shot. My right shoulder suffered the kick back of the weapon... it did had some hell of a kick to it.

"Target hit, good job." Jason spoke.

I got up saying it was enough.. I didn't want to hurt my right shoulder, and I started to notice the pain killers for my left shoulder was wearing off. The two men continued to shoot... how many bullets they have to waste? I checked my rounds... I only had 58 shots left.

I watched as they try their pistols now, I man came up to us with a shotgun, seeing whats going on. He was wearing a brown jacket. I gave him a greeting, until the man in hunter hoodie came up on us.

"Hey, we should keep it quiet! We are in the brink of war you know?!"

"Well we haven't heard gunshots in awhile so..." someone spoke of.

From distracted of shooting, I completely forgot about the camp being in danger for a minute. I immediately walked back inside, waiting for Jason and Sam to come back.

For a a minute I sat down to take another pain killer pill. These were working well, lasted about half the day. I couldn't read the labels though, how many for how often I should take these pain killers. One day I would have to get someone to read the label that speaks this language.

Just as everyone went inside I heard a vehicle engine to the northwest, someone was approaching... I clenched my gun... it can't them, can it be? There is no shooting yet.

"Who's that?!" I yelled out.

Sam and Jason told me to stay in the back of the camp and wait for a second. The camp was silent, until I heard distance voices in-front of the gate.

"Let us in, we have news to tell...[murmuring]....do we have to give our bloody ID, you guys know who we are...[murmuring]...... alright open the gate guys."

The gate opened, revealing a red van, a group of about 4 men jumped out. They all looked beaten and tired, some with fresh bloody bandages.

"Who are they?" I approached Jason and asked.

"The Volki, the ones who were fighting in the north." I nodded, listening in the conversation while Jason went to speak to a few people.

From the good news I heard, the Volki were the ones that announced they intercepted the red beret men, and won the fight. There were casualties, but they don't know how many. They came here to tell us we are safe, for now. They wanted rest for the night here, in case reinforcements show up, plus they were beaten tired.

Everyone was gathering around the Volki, celebrating and sharing basic supplies. In the distance I heard another engine. It was a white car with two occupants. They pulled in and parked. The two occupants were a woman and a man. I took a look at the woman, couldn't believe I was seeing another one. It's a awkward moment actually, finally someone that is not a man. I was shy to get in the group, so I sat back down near the campfire. Jason then touched my shoulder and told me he had to go, had business to do.

"How long you'll be gone?" I asked.

He looked at me for awhile. "Not sure, but if your around here for awhile, then we will meet again hopefully."

I nodded and understood. I was actually sad... didn't want him to go and Sam. They were the closest friends or helpers I ever met. I wished him good luck.. telling him he better come back. He smiled... and went on his way with Sam close behind.

I sighed and look at the fire, then took out my journal and started writing while I can hear the woman and other men talking along. I then heard a man sit down beside me. I stopped writing, didn't look up yet because I felt a new presence of a person beside me. I slowly closed my journal, put it away, then looked at the man who sat to my left.

He was one of the men who came out of the red van, he wore a black bandanna, green fatigues... I couldn't recall much what else he had that made him look familiar.

"Hello...?" I was kind of nervous.

"Hello.. miss.. your name?"

"Victoria" He then mumbled my name a couple a times under his breath. He then looked at me with bright eyes...

"Ah, very nice name. What is your story here?"

I then told him my story, but I was interrupted when he suddenly schooched his arse closer to me with a innocent smile... okay.... that was awkward. So I schooched myself a little ways from him in a sneaky way. He seemed nervous... and fidgety, liek he was about to say something, until he blurted it out.

"You know... you are very beautiful lady I ever seen."

Serious?! What I'm I the next beauty queen in the broken down 22nd century civilization, surviving against ugly bastards that will eat us alive? I took a deep breath. I didn't want to be rude. He was being nice. I smiled, but looked behind him and noted the other woman that was in the camp.... I used the same excuse that I did with Jason.

"Oh.. thank you... [i forgot his name]... but I'm sure that lady over there is much nicer looking then me."

He turned his head to get a glance of the woman, then back at me with the awkward smile.

"No, you are much more beautiful..."

I shook my head.

"Well, I appreciate that but... I.. don't really go for that sort of route I'm sorry."

I can hear whispers in the background talking about us... it must of been his buddy friends.. I forced a smile, trying not to feel anger or embarrassed.

"Oh no! I am sorry.. I didn't mean to jump that far. I am just saying you are pretty, Victoria."

We exchanged brief conversations because I tried to concentrate writing my journal. He asked about it, I said it is just about my story.

"I have a journal too, I write about different things though, why write about your story?"

I looked at him for a moment, it was kind of a dumb question but I answered.

"Well, it's if I die... and people find my body.. they will find my journal and know what happened to me. Especially for Ty... he... if he finds me he will know my story."

Saying that shocked me and sadness, so I stood up starting walking away.

"Excuse me.. sorry" I told him.

The memories of Ty flowed into my head again, wondering if he's dead or not... I wiped the tears off my face. Someone approached me to ask if I was okay, I said yes. After a few minutes I sat back down with the man.

"Sorry, about that.."

"Oh, it is okay, I understand what hell we live on, I have.. lost people too."

I got distracted by the other woman and man speaking to each other... their conversation made me assume something. I whispered to him...

"Is.. that other woman married?"

He looked over then back...

"I... think so... I don't know actually... but I know another woman that is getting married next week I think."

I raised my eyebrow.. that will be the worst wedding ever in this stage of life. I actually wanted to attend to it.

"Oh? When is it and where?"

"Ah I think... next week.. here, I am sure I will have to ask my friends. But... that's the reason I said that, see.. I was wondering if you like to come with me to the wedding together."

WAIT JUST A SECOND.... is he asking me on a date already?! Didn't I just hint him I wasn't interested in this stuff?! Jeez these men are worse then men before the outbreak. I try not to look upset or surprised at him... I hid my emotions... trying to think quickly what to say without hurting his idiotic loved feelings. I can hear rumors and whispering already going between people in the camp.. I had to think of something.

"Um... I don't know I"ll think about it. I mean... I am planning to stick around here so, if I'm here for the wedding I guess we both be here right?"

I don't know if he was upset or happy.. I sometimes can't tell under bandannas when I sometimes can. He took a breath..

"Alright, that is fair enough, hope to see you there then."

His voice told me he's a little happy.

My attention was caught when I hear cheering. A couple people were having a silly dance off. The woman was gonna dance in, so I caught my attention that I wanted to dance with her.

"I feel like dancing with her, you coming?"

He perked up and smiled largely,

"oh yes... please dance."

Oh gawd... men pleasures....

I jogged over, slinging my weapon to my back and started dancing with the other woman, I suddenly felt not shy anymore.. and part of the crowd.

"You see! The woman dance better then men!" I shouted out.

For a few minutes we both danced. I wasn't sure how good I was dancing, but the people liked it. I got tired after, because I was dancing with my backpack on. When I went to join the crowd to watch other performers I was smiling for once.... in happiness.

Watching all the performers do silly movements and celebrating the war in the north, made me feel in a belonging.. or just in a happiness feeling from all that is happening in the world. Sometimes... you just got to give out all your best shot make people happy for once... because this war will never end, and it hurts to live in misery for the rest of your life. So... you just got to do something fun to keep it out of your mind.

..........always run.........always move...

Journal #12 - Trust issues...

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Matt    21

Another good entry I all way's laugh at the comments you make on the men hitting on you.

Also are these written about things that happened a while back or things that happened the most recent time you played because this seems their is actually a populated spot on the map?

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