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Server time (UTC): 2021-09-20 20:21

Short snippets of life in DayZ


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[Me flying the AN-2 with 2 other people, bored and climbing to 2000 m]

[Me]: I wonder how fast we can go with no engines, straight down

[Passenger #1]: Dude, just tell me when to eject.

[Passenger #2]: Even if we crash, we're likely to survive anyway.

[4 minutes later we're standing next to the plane wreck, looking at a body]

[Passenger #1]: And *he* was the optimistic one

[Me and [vGc]Gammage are driving some CDF to a meeting in two UAZs]

[Gammage]: I think the rear UAZ just exploded in the middle of town

[We secure the perimeter and Gammage, having holstered his main, takes a look at a CDF member who is unconscious, and prepares to give him a bloodbag]

[Gammage]: Don't worry bud, I'm a certified medic

[i turn around to cover from zeds when a gunshot sounds, prompting the immediate reversal of the above]

[Me]: Did you just...shoot him?

[Gammage]: [beat]...maybe...

[Hysterical laughter ensues]

[Having just repaired a helicopter, I take off when a 'friend' decides to shoot the tail rotor for shits and giggles]

[Me]: Dude, what are you doooo..[he takes out the rotor]

[The heli spins around, instantly killing the shooter with the tail. Everyone in TS loses it]

[shooter]: Best example of instant karma I've seen in this game.

[Me flying with a newbie pilot, showing him how to avoid enemy fire]

[Me]: And to avoid sniper fire, you do maneuver X

[server crashes]

[Newbie]: That's...effective

[On a vGc meeting, me and Nyx are walking on the coast near Kotei Shima, talking. Everyone is partying, having fun]

[Me]: So yeah..[i suddenly drop dead]

[TS falls silent for a second]

[Nyx]: What the F?

[Nihoolious]: Oh shit

[Victor Cruz] What happened?

[Nihoolious]: I just aimed the G36 above your head to take a shot over his [my] head, but the bullet hit DMZ! That's VooDoo shit man!

[Nyx]: Nihoolious, what the fuck?! We were just talking!

[Me]: Explain what you did

[Nihoolious]:Well, I aimed with the crosshair slightly above your head, at a rock behind you! The bottom of the circle around the crosshair was on your head. There's no way it should have hit you!

[Me]: The bottom of that circle is zeroed for 200m. How far do you think I was?

[Nihoolious]: [beat]..I'm sorry!

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