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SweetJoe

Wandering, wandering in hopeless night.

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SweetJoe    387

I am once again alone. A return to normal and a step away from the chaos that others bring into my life. However...this is the first time that being alone has felt so...wrong. I will keep in touch with my friends as ive done in the past. Everything will be alright.

This journal will be used to document the next few months. If you have found this journal, or my body, please find Derek Steel and give it to him. He is often in the northern region of South Zagoria.

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Lil_Beefy    0

Wat is dis. Finally done falling, Joe?

What you did. It's there. And I see it.

Keen for more Joe! Keep them coming, I know how much work you put in and these new entries should be even better :D

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PandoraX3M    0

I am once again alone. A return to normal and a step away from the chaos that others bring into my life. However...this is the first time that being alone has felt so...wrong. I will keep in touch with my friends as ive done in the past. Everything will be alright.

This journal will be used to document the next few months. If you have found this journal, or my body, please find Derek Steel and give it to him. He is often in the northern region of South Zagoria.

Still cant believe that you left...you're always welcome with me <3

love you <3

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Tredrok    1

We will always be watching Joe. You will never truly be alone. ;)

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SweetJoe    387

The moon rises over South Zagoria, Over me. As i watch it swim through the sky i cant help but feel as if I've always been sitting up there, watching the world spin round endlessly, unable to change the world below me. Helpless to change that which is out of reach.

This is nothing new to me. An old feeling rising from within.

I used to wander graveyards looking for my soul, or a friend. Once upon a time I met a girl. She loved me very much and I her. We were a force of nature, Equally strong when apart but when placed together we were unstoppable. Now here, separated by the expanse of time and space I alone in my time of weakness have been reduced to a shell of my former image. I refuse to let this continue. She was always the Strength, MY strength. She saw things through the eyes of aggression, where as I saw things through the eyes of peace. She was and will forever be the Yin to my Yang.

Our Children would of been beautiful. Perhaps one day fate will return me to her.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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If I knew Joe was this emotional IG I would try and talk to him more and help him out, or at least try. Good stuff Joe, as always.

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SweetJoe    387

I'm tired of the petty fighting out there. People are so stressed out, they are adjusting to the new world we live in. They are so fearful, even when they rob you. Its...sad.

Live your life without fear. Don't fear death because she is always following you. Dont fear Life because its all you have.

I've decided to not carry a rifle, at least for a time. Truth is that they are people killers. I can get along without them i think. If the black hats want me they can have me. If the rumors ive been hearing are true...but thats hear-say.

I ran around for a time with Derek the other day. It was good to see him alive and well. He seemed as happy as Derek gets. Also ive had some dumb kid following me. hes gonna get himself killed running with me. People who follow me dont have Happy Endings.

I've been spending my nights at the Tradepost. Been Getting to know the good doctor pretty well. She makes a good bartender even if its a waste of her skills.

There were some irishmen in the bar lastnight. Always reminds me of the good men and women of the IRA. Good conversation and it felt good to relax and joke around.

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//paula and i got the message that you want to meet us. hopefully it'll happen soon, jibby can't figure out if you want to kill us or genuinely talk. expect caution. :P

nice entries man, you know i love em.

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SweetJoe    387

//paula and i got the message that you want to meet us. hopefully it'll happen soon, jibby can't figure out if you want to kill us or genuinely talk. expect caution. :P

nice entries man, you know i love em.

((ummm...i did what now? I told those ISOA guys to say i said "Hello" How did they tell you i wanted to see you? haha im so confused. i think you mean the Remnants of the Watchers Jibby. Cause i didnt arrange a meeting.

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((ummm...i did what now? I told those ISOA guys to say i said "Hello" How did they tell you i wanted to see you? haha im so confused. i think you mean the Remnants of the Watchers Jibby. Cause i didnt arrange a meeting.

oh damn. i was legit told that you wanted to meet paula and i. :P

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SweetJoe    387

Today I sat and watched the sunrise. I couldn't help but wonder how many more will I see. Each day, each hour, each minute--It's a gift. All my life I have never felt so alive. Perhaps Lady death will look upon me and smile, or maybe shed a tear. In truth she wouldn't care one way or another.

I'm getting really lonely again. I remember those nights when I first got here. Put everything I've learned in life to the test. I felt like i had mastered this Survival thing. Had shelter in a safe place, Lots of food and water. I had a safety perimeter and settled down for a long stay, even setting snares and water collection systems so i wouldn't have to go into town. I actually was starting to put on weight. Had plenty of weed to smoke, so happily i would sit and kill hours just planning what i was going to do next, and saving energy so i wouldn't burn calories. Things were good, but i found that over the course of weeks, maybe months, I mentally began to break down. I was hallucinating and fearful of Russians coming to kill me, or Zombies coming to eat me while i slept. I was loseing my mind because i was alone. People need people.

I dont want to be the crazy hermit up on the hill.

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SweetJoe    387

There comes a time in every mans life when he must walk the desert to search for the truth. Want to know whats in the desert? Sand, heat, Scorpions and death. Thats the sick joke about life, and truely something you must experience to understand.

I walked the shores today, border to border around the sea. I didnt encounter a single soul.

I wonder where everyones gone off to.

I'm almost home.

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SweetJoe    387

Its good to be home again.

I forgive those who have wronged me.

I hope they live long happy lives, and never forget what they have done, so that they never make the same mistake twice.

Im going to live out the rest of my days in this country. I hope those days are happy ones.

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SweetJoe    387

Last night I found happiness. Funny thing is that you never know how long happiness will last. Truth is that nothing last forever. I am going to enjoy myself and try not to be selfish, its a dance after all, the harmony of two bonded in mutual entertainment and enjoyment. It seems we both like to play games. I do enjoy games, I may have underestimated this one. I wont ever do that again...the things you learn about someone in the heat of the moment...or in moments of extreme mutual boredom.

Right now life is good. More than boring at times, but good. We have food, water, Shelter, security, and friends. We can't ask for it to get any better without being greedy or selfish.

Our plans seem to fail miserably when we try to leave. However they only fail when our actions are selfless. Its almost like someone or something is trying to keep us here. When we leave trouble happens, and sometimes its as if its an act of fate. However if were were to go cause trouble we find we have amazing luck and things go well. What ever is trying to keep us here is trying to compromise us. Sometimes we hear invisible people sneaking around..

ghosts. Its...getting interesting.

Papa died last night. Connor told me and I didnt beleive him. He asked me to go with them...I couldnt bring myself to. I feel guilty because I know if I was there I could of talked him out of jumping. NO. Im not going to blame myself. I had great respect for him. His suicide is dishonorable, and he will pay the consequences in his next life

I will miss my friend but We Do Not Mourn.

spent time with derek. Brought him to the tradepost and wouldnt you know it? The council attacked. Occupants of the tradepost shot it down. Derek, in all the commotion snuck out and found the pilot and killed him. Dozens of people went looking...derek found him instantly and put him down . If ever there was someone who hated the council its derek. I love that Viking like a brother.

more later if I have time.

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SweetJoe    387

Written on this page is the lyrics to a poem, some sections are underlined.

FAR ARDEN POEM by Jim Morrison

And so I say to you

The silk handkerchief was

embroidered in China or Japan

behind the steel curtain And

no one can cross the borderline

w/out proper credentials.

This is to say that we are all

sensate & occasionally sad

& if every partner in crime

were to incorporate promises

in his program the dance

might end & all our fiends

would follow.

Who are our friends?

Are they sullen & slow? Do

they have great desire? Or

are they one of the multitude who

walk doubting their impossible

regret. Certainly things happen

& reoccur in continuous promise;

All of us have found a safe

niche where we can store up

riches & talk to our fellows

on the same premise of disaster.

But this will not do. No, this

will never do. There are

continents & shores which

beseech our understanding.

Seldom have we been so slow.

Seldom have we been so far.

My only wish is to see

Far Arden again.

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