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Server time (UTC): 2021-10-18 06:44

Totally fucked up.


Terra

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  • Legend

Apparently you have found my little book.

Nice to meet you.

If you read this I'm most likely dead but you will get to know me.

Maybe you want to tell my story.

Listen and read along: [mp3]https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/275273912/Untitled.mp3[/mp3]

My name is Paula Hamilton, I am 21 years now, I from Germany and I came here 2 years ago. I wanted to study here. Then everything changed.

I stayed in 'Elektro' for a long time, hidden in a school library. It would take to long to tell you everything, but a group named the Black hat Militia saved me. They asked no questions but I would've had no answer regardless.

I changed... I changed a lot. Today it is like I have everything forgotten what was in the past, I'm not innocent any more. I did horrible things, but I don't regret it.

If I learned something, then it is to protect me and my friends. No matter what.

The undead aren't the bad ones. They are annoying yes, but dumb. You can kill them easily if there are not to many. They are no humans anymore.

The ones you must fear are the other survivors. Believe me, they kill for beans, much worse if they kill to enjoy it.

I enjoy to kill the ones who enjoy to kill. Strange heh, I'm exactly what I hate... just a bit different.

Don't judge me, I can do that alone.

My friends in BHM know me, they know about my strengths and my weaknesses. I can be myself, even if I dont know anymore who I am.

Once I was party girl. I loved fashion... now I feel dirty everyday. Camouflaged clothing doesn't suit me. But I try to look good, even If I don't feel it.

I need to be very careful these days. There are people who don't like me. I don't why, but I guess it is because I have big mouth...my weakness.

I play may role 'Bad Ass Paula' I guess this is also my strength, but I'm scared all the time to be honestly even if I don't show it.

I met a woman, named Alice ...I forgot her last name. She is a mystery to me. And she really is fucked up! I like her, but her past is dangerous. I promised to protect her, but I don't know if I'm able. I don't know if I'm strong enough. The most important part, I don't know if Major Tom, chief of BHM, would help me. Normally we don't care about other people, we protect our own, I know that. But I told her BHM would do anything for her protection...

I lied.

I don't know if they help... big mouth again. Fuck.

Guess who is fucked up now!

I did kiss her. It was amazing. I don't know why I did it. Maybe because men always want the same thing, but she is... different.

There is a problem, maybe not a problem but there is this guy. His name is Joe.

Joe... oh hell. I just realize how sick I am!

Joe Kalista. That guy! Amazing!

Oh, I think I'm in love. I guess it is a game for him.

He is part of the Watchers. A group that is more concerned about others than about themselves.

I call them "good people".

I don't know if he is playing with me.

I tried to activate my "You can't hurt my feelings"-Modus, but I think I have a virus.

We have a date, I have to wait how it goes. He's just too interesting to not to try.

No risk, no fun.

I heard there is another woman. I don't know her name but I think she was the one at the Free Medics camp the other day. Good looking, nice hair, nice ass....she gave me the 'bitch look.'

I told Joe about that. He was not surprised.

Fuck, why do I even care?

I'm scared about myself. They should be other things to care about.

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Interesting read, looking forward to seeing how Paula will handle the struggle with who she really is/ used to be and how many people will get hurt along the way.

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  • Legend

Feel sorry for this Joe, can tell you will be the alpha of the relationship.

Good read none the less!

// I dont think so...

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  • Legend

If you read this I'm most likely dead but you will get to know me.

// Wait... Paula is dead? :(

Awesome read nonetheless! <3

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  • Emerald

If you read this I'm most likely dead but you will get to know me.

// Wait... Paula is dead? :(

Awesome read nonetheless! <3

I hope so, then Alice is all mine. I'll catch her on the rebound.

Great read Terra. Looking forward to more.

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  • Legend

No no..Paula isnt dead^^ I just want you to get to know Paula a bit better maybe. <3

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  • Legend

Every rp story from a lass talks about Mr Joe..... Dear o dear... This is going to heat up soon.

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  • MVP

well then :D

Look forward to more Terra

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  • Titanium

I need some lesson from Sweet Joe. Damn! That guy... All the ladies are interested.

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  • Emerald

((( I always enjoy when you post things. Paula is so strong, yet she is also delicate, like a beautiful flower. I look forward to your return. You should receive a letter at some point today...couriers are so slow. >=-D ♡♥¤♥♡

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  • Legend

//Thank you very much for the kind words. <3

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  • Legend

Nice read Terra, nice read indeed.

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  • Emerald

That was a nice read :)

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  • Emerald

A absolute amazing read, you put focus on soo much more compared to other people i mean the other "survivour logs" people write are good, but you nailed it. Cant wait for more

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  • Legend

Thank you so much. I was really unsure if someone would even be interested to read about Paula <3

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