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TheZallow

Could use some opinions

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TheZallow    0

So been trying to flesh out my back story, and I think I am getting there, well sort of. I'm kind of stuck because something just doesn't feel right and I could use some opinions. A lieutenant of a yet unnamed armed force (haven't decided yet, might be US forces as that's what I have as a place holder) gets handed a file and it it is some pages from a journal that gets washed up on a shoreline far outside the C.Q.S (Chernarus Quarantine Sector), after reading them he immediately sends them to the general in charge of the Chernarus quarantine sector who flips open the file, sits back in an antique oak chair that squeaks, takes a drag on his cigar and begins to read.....

Now here comes the thing that doest sit quite right

The File

-----------==== UNITED STATES MARINE CORP - RESTRICTED INFORMATION ===---------------

-- US MILITARY File: # 277-A67-568

ITEM: Journal Pages

FOUND: Chernarus - Elektrozavodsk - Along Shoreline

DATE: 22-SEPT-2013

SUBJECT: FORMER BRITISH ARMY PILOT - NAME: UNKNOWN: AGE: UNKNOWN

SUBJECT: FINANCE/WIFE OF PILOT - NAME: AMBER - AGE: UNKNOWN

SUBJECT: BROTHER - NAME: DEREK - AGE: UNKNOWN

==RESTRICTED DUE TO SENSITIVE INFORMATION==

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

3 May 2012

"God obviously hates me, two days before I am due to rotate back home and I get sent on one of the worst duties possible for a brick lifter, shadowing a regiment on a milk run from eight hundred feet in 120 degree heat, not to mention the shit ton of sand I'm going to have to clean out of the rotors when I get back to base. Well I can't wait to get home and taste some of Ambers sweet sweet home cooking. Might give that a few weeks, gain a few pounds then maybe go out looking for a job on civvie street. Knowing my luck I'm going to end up training wannabes how to fly a helicopter cause they want to be the next air wolf or some shit."

5 May 2012

"Heading home, Oh yeah!, Can't wait"

12 April 2013

Well it's been just under a year since I last kept a journal, finding the old one in a box of my old gear from the forces sort of gave me the idea to start it up again, so what's happened. Well me and Amber decided to tie the knot back at Christmas. She always loved the idea of a winter wedding and lucky for us it actually snowed!, couldn't believe it but it definitely was the added touch the day needed. As I feared I ended up doing exactly what I didn't want to do, I ended up as a damn Whirly bird trainer. I hate my job, but hey Me Amber and my brother Derek leave tomorrow for our backpacking trip across Europe and then Russia and we plan to end up in the tropical resort of Parisio on Sarahni Island on or around Derek's birthday and we may stick around for my birthday a few weeks later. Heard it's fantastic.

13 April 2013

Headed down to Dover this morning to jump the ferry to Calais. Couldn't believe it, Derek had to be the one to forget his blood passport. What a dick head, so that left me and Amber at customs with no coffee cause the little café they had there was still waiting on a delivery, so all we had was weak tea and a soging bacon sandwich. Luckily he managed to get back with a few minutes to spare. He did mention something about a riot at Heathrow airport, just made me glad we we are not flying. Done that enough in my years with the good old 655 and lately training the unwashed idiots at Manston. To travel somewhere without a rotor or jet engine will be a welcome escape. So we are on the ferry now about twenty minutes out from Dover. Calais here we come .... Just hope Amber doesn't throw up on me again. Bacon never looks the same coming back up.

14 April 2013

Seems the riots at Heathrow airport we're pretty made, even made it onto the French news. Seems they closed the airport off completely and there are still people inside. So glad we dint fly now. Anyway we left Calais about an hour ago and now heading to Lille then from there across the boarder to Belgium and into Brussels. Not sure yet we may spend the night there or hop the train over to Germany so we are in Cologne for the morning.

21 April 2013

Well we never made it to Cologne, in fact the idiots we are we overslept and ended up in Stuttgart which wasn't really help full because from Cologne we we're going to head directly west to Erfurt where we was going to meet a friend of Derek's who was going to put us up for the night and drive us to Dresden where we was due to spend a few days, relax, gear up on fresh supplies then go into Wroclaw in Poland. Strange stuff over the last few days though. The news has been banging on about riots in London, New York, Moscow Strasbourg and Berne. I don't get people these days. So we are currently stuck in Suttgart until we meet the train tomorrow which will take us to Augsburg and even though I hated the idea and refused we decided to put our money together, dip into the overdraft and just get plane tickets to go to Sarahni, have a holiday and celebrate our birthdays back home in good old England.

23 April 2013

Ahh Sarahni, beautiful sun, great scenery. Time to relax ... will probably forget journal entries till the end of the holiday and the fucking irritating news reports, seems all they can ever do is talk about Riots, and the funniest one some bullshit about the dead coming back to life, I mean seriously this is total crap. Probably hackers worming their way into the news feeds like the few times it happened in the states with fake zombie warnings, wish they would get a fucking life. Anyway the reason to no journal, well after all don't want it used against me as blackmail material by any possible kids in the future hahaha. Speaking of which I think Amber is going to try and approach the subject, could be wrong but she has been dropping some hints about the future and increasing the size of the family.

14 May 2013 -11:27am

The holiday was fantastic, we got so shit faced so many times. Got sun burnt. ate too much, completely relaxed and the s... well lets just say the relaxation made the nights me and Amber shared absolutely explosive and fantastic, especially now we are official trying for a baby. That's right she finally got up the nerve to talk to me about it then asked the question. I love her so much. The only down point on the holiday is now we are stuck at the airport at Pita, and the crap they are feeding us is total bullshit. We are being told that aircraft are delayed because of an issue with the local radar system, but I know a military insertion when I see one. Something Is seriously up

14 May 2013 13:43

Seriously fucked up, they just shot twenty unarmed civvies, some bullshit about an incurable infection and I am sure I overheard a few of the light infantry talking about a island wide quarantine. Time for this soldier to evac with his new regiment.

14 May 2014 18:21

This is so totally fucked up, and I mean FUCKED! UP! oh my god I can not believe things went down that way, yeah I have weapons training, taught how to escape situations but never had to kill a guy before. I feel so sick, I just want to vomit. Got Derek at the controls, I managed to take out the two guys at the far hangar after breaking myself, Amber and Derek free from the crowd and flanking around the airfield. Wish I had not killed them, ... no I couldn't have I swear I saw them moving and getting up as we were haring it down the runway. Derek says the fuel tank got hit and we don't have much longer but according to the gps their is an airfield in the Chernarus region out near some city called Berezino. Think we might land there, patch up, refuel and get the fuck home.

14 May 2014 23.13

We landed and patched the engine, managed to refuel the plane, we we're going to be heading down along the coast before we swing round and head for home, but there is a problem. We got chased into one of the hangars by these insane fuckers, they were just moaning and drooling. Don't know what the fuck we are going to do I can hear them clawing and bashing against the hangar doors and this shitty little makarov pistol only has four rounds left. It is going to be a long night for me while Amber and Derek sleep.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

CURRENT STATUS: UNKNONW

CURRENT LOCATION: INSIDE THE QUARANTINE ZONE - CHERNARUS

FILE ENDS

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Any ideas, Suggestions, edit's, opinions would be a massive help ^_^

also sorry if it is in the wrong section and if it is could one of you darling admins, nudge it into the right place please ? :D

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Texas532    0

Read about half will finish tomorrow. So far great job, a few grammatical mistakes here and there though.

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GlitchyV2    0

Nice, long read! A very good story, the only errors i can see are those few usually grammatical errors ;)

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TheZallow    0

yeah I know the grammar/punctuation/spelling is very weak it is usually something I polish up at the end.

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