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Not Very Sober Novy Sobor

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*The man takes a seat in the backroom and holds his radio close to his face*

"To anybody who can hear this, I have an amazing opportunity for you! Do you like to get high? Has life really let you down? How would you like to come and drown out your sorrows with a little bit of weed? My man, Buddy, has opened a Marijuana Dispensary in Novy Sobor! We are almost giving away weed down here, so if you're looking for a high and mighty time, I suggest you come down! We will gladly accept paper as donations, as we can't grow paper, unfortunately."

*He pauses*

"Also, to any assholes who want to rob us, don't bother. We don't have anything worth robbing, and anything that IS worth robbing, we are essentially giving away."

"Anyway, come on down, and help eachother forget our shitty lives!"

*He sets down his radio and begins to tend to the storefront*

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*Within a house in Stary, this broadcast comes through loud and clear*

*Holds PTT, gruff Cockney accent ensues*

"Oi oi, now this is gud to heyah. A ganja dealah just down the way from mah current locale."

*Puffs his cigarette*

"Think i might come by on the morrah for a pick ap, and a little meet and greet of course."

"Names Mr Wulf and hopefully we can do some business, you and I"

*Releases PTT*

Edited by Fenrir

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*Laying in bed in the upstairs bedroom of a log restaurant cabin, he picks the radio up* 

*A calm and older sounding British man begins to respond* 

"Glad I had a part to play in this endeavour mate, I'll probably be down to triple your stock in a day or two."

"I hope that truck was put to good use as well. See ya round lads."

*His radio goes silent* 

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*The hippie grasps his radio close to mouth, clears his throat and presses the PTT*

Heeey maan... This is Buddy Jones, owner of Not Very Sober Novy Sobor Dispensary. The shop might be on haiku for awhile maan.. We have the flower power, we just can't generate the paper we need to keep the doors open.

*The hippie takes moment to take a puff of his joint while still holding down the PTT*

Sorry to our investors, I'll make it back too you in some way, just please don't behead me maaan.

*A faint sobbing can be heard as the hippie releases the PTT*


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*Kenneth is lurking around in a dumpster as he picks up hos radio*

Yo dude, so im interested what strains and soil you guys use. I proud myself in growing the highest quality cannabis in the region. Tell me more about the product dudes and i might help out. 

*Kenneth passes out*

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*An exhausted Buddy grabs his radio inhales and presses the PTT*

After a day of realigning my chakaras the shop will be back open tomorrow. Pre-rolled joints now come at a premium. Fear not, i'll be hosting free classes on how to smoke out of apples and pears if you're just buying the flower. As well as complementary horoscope readings with every purchase! 

*A rhythmic tapping on a metal shelf can be heard as Buddy breaks into tune*

Together we stand, peace is our plan, with a joint in hand, we stick it to the man, Stayin' Sober not a fan, Novy Sobor's our land!

*Buddy releases the PTT*


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