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andysuter

A Radio jingle comes over the airwaves

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As he shuffles through paperwork, Father David looks at his empty Diary and presses a few buttons on the radio, trying to look professional while cowboy is off collecting wood.

A radio jingle comes over the radio...

“Hello listeners, Father David here. Ive just recovered from a bad case of diarrhea so apologies for radio silence for a short while. I wont be eating chicken for a while, let alone anything cooked by Mr Cowboy or Connor. Sorry to camp mates for the mess I made in the usual crapping area.

Anyway…. Back on topic…..Due to a serious of unfortunate events with some kids from Anarchisty or whatever they are called, our radio interviews stopped as soon as they began. It takes time to relocate all the radio equipment to secure locations but we are ready to start broadcasting again.

The interview list I had previously is now pretty much wiped out as I can no longer reach the interviewee’s. I assume they have left the country. So… that leaves it open for anyone not associated with the scumbags at Anarchisty or that disturbed young man Mr Lorcan to meet up for a cup of Yorkshire tea and an interview. Im afraid Anarchisty are just downright rude and that Mr lorcan is 3 pennies short of a full shilling so I doubt he would be able to string 4 words together without dribbling.

So, anyway, if anyone would like the opportunity to be interviewed, get something off their chest, tell us about yourselves or your group etc then please get in touch on my private frequency  and we will set something up. Im especially interested in anyone that has something to say on Mr Lorcan. Maybe someone has finally caught him molesting animals or something, whatever.

I would say at this point, if you are thinking of arranging an interview with the intention of selling me out for a BMW or whatever my current value is, then don’t. It wont end well for anyone. I may be in my sunset years, but ive still got a cracking right hook.

This is Father David, for Redwood Radio, signing out.

Edited by andysuter

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Father David walks over to the radio and switches it on and off a few times. The static comes and goes. 

‘Cowboy…. Can you check if the batteries are working on this thing? Maybe the Ariel has fallen off or something.

If we dont get an interview soon, we are going to have to resort to operation-heads above the parapet'

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*Kenneth stumbles trough a swamp as he picks up his radio*

Yo, it's me, Kenneth. If you wanna interview a neutral part off this war I am here dude. I saw the fight first handed on the island yesterday. I was really afraid. Get back to me dude.

*Kenneth passes out*

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Father David presses almost falls out of his rocking chair as the radio bursts into life. He spills his cup of tea as he reaches for the mic.

“hello, Kenneth, Father David here. I think weve met before at our old radio tower, if you’re your same Kenneth. The other guy was a hobo. Is that you?

If it is you, it would be perfect to get an interview with you. Im really interested in how all the turmoil is affecting the citizens of the area.

Clearly we have some security issues to deal with that i need to speak with our security team about, unless all the anarchisty people are with Jesus yet. I’ll pass on the fantastic news to cowboy and we will get something set up.

He puts the radio down and picks up his now chipped favorite piece of porcelain that he found in a house up north.

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George presses the PTT to speak.

"Priest. I don't want to be interviewed, but I need to contact you privately. It's paramount that you contact me on 92.7. If you recognize my voice, don't worry. You don't even have to meet me."

George releases the PTT.

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