Nothing really interesting about me, I was born in the UK in Birmingham. My parents both addicts and my 3 other siblings killed off in the military which they thought would be an escape from a shit life. I decided to stay and keep my courage, which I found hard since I am going through my solitary phase in life and it feels like it will never end. Guess my name suits me nicely. I am not the kindest person you will meet. I am straight up, cruel and I stopped caring a long time ago. It takes a lot for me to bring someone close to me, but when I do find that right person, I will be the clingiest fucker.
I find this disaster surreal, I never really noticed a big difference after everything kicked off because the world was a shit hole anyway.
I actually saw this as a chance to just watch people bring out their true personalities. It is scary I know but I was not too worried because I know I can be just as bad. I started not caring anymore...I never have to be honest... I say it all the time and I remind myself every day I am on this planet solely for my own fun and entertainment. Now let us be honest before all this shit kicked off...most people had problems, but now EVERYONE has a problem! and I won't let those problems get to me.
I am not sure what my aim is, I have short-term ambitions I like to keep my mind on but other than those I have no idea. I keep everything to either myself. All everyone wants really is for all this shit to blow over and end but I can't see that happening anytime soon, or probably never. The one thing I have noticed people do wrong is to get sidetracked... Getting sidetracked is the worst thing possible, you set a goal and end up getting further away from it which sinks you into more shite. If you do what I do, just stick to one goal and do not stop until it is done, then you will find yourself in a cycle doing similar things over and over again such as going to the same places, talking to the same people and following the same routes which will eventually keep you safe because you are used to doing what you have already done before. If anyone stops you, just ignore the bullshit and keep moving because listening to them is giving them what they want, and that is to kill you...EVERYONE WANTS TO KILL YOU!
Other than everything going on, my life hasn't changed that much. I stick to my tradition, I wear black, I show my personality and I show that I don't care. Most of it anyway was to show people how fucked I was after a shitty upbringing, being emo and all people just assume you're looking for attention and to be fair they are kinda right but at the same time you do it because you need to feel different from others.
I wish I could be better at these, I wish that people would take me for who I am. I pretend I am helping others, but really I am the one that needs help. I need someone to turn around
and tell me I matter instead of me feeling disposable like I was to my family. It isn't my fault, sometimes I want to turn around to those that think I am creepy and just embrace them and tell them I am sorry for being a nuisance, but I know that if I do that I will have no one. No matter how hard I try to make myself seem strong, I am not....but...I am working on it, and I don't know what it is I am doing but it is working. I am starting to hold in my emotions and I am learning to use them to my advantage. No longer will I be a burden to anyone...
She is high with energy, Probably the only person that I can actually look up to if I am honest. As much as she may make
stupid decisions and may or may not make her mind up she still stays positive regardless of all the shit that goes off. I think I can help her find a path to what she wants
even though I know for a fact that she does not like me or even trust me. The point is that I have only ever felt anything good while being with her because she is always energetic and positive which has done me a big favor and kept me off the edge for a while. It would be a shame for her to go.
He is a cop, not the best thing to be around especially with my history but I will not get into that. Seems cool and he wants to help but I don't think he is one to stick.
He does what people tell him by the looks of it and from how he behaves I don't really think he has the attitude to be protecting someone. Like the type of guy that would walk away
If it meant his life is at risk. I hope he proves me wrong...
He seems decent, ex-military by the looks of it and he knows what he is doing. I know he means well, I have not known him long but I have yet to point him out for anything, although I recently noticed he was creating a carved tally in his helmet that he likes to carry. Vlad told me that the tally was just "Memories". I want to know more about them. One thing that is very odd with Vlad is he seems to get attached to people very quickly, he had no second thoughts when we asked if he wanted to hang around for a bit and honestly I did not expect him to stay. At first, I thought he would lurk around for the day but then that day quickly turned into over a week. I wonder what he is really in it for...
A prick, this dude seemed fun at first, I thought he was annoying due to his "mental health" but I just got over it quickly, until he decided to ignore his mind by gagging me and tieing me up with a knife, while I was severely injured. I am not going to forget what this guy did to me back in the hospital up in Severograd. Thing is, I have to get used to him now since he is lurking around people I trust slightly, I still do not trust him, I need to keep playing this fake game with him where I pretend I have gotten used to his presence when really, he is just a burden to me and I could not give a shit what happens to him. It isn't WHAT he did, it's HOW he did it...
Coby J Bodner
Now this guy, from the start he was okay, kind of had a weird attitude with me and was pretty blunt with everything he said even though we had a good time on the roof dancing and singing and shit trying to lighten the mood, but I knew something was wrong. He admitted his thoughts in front of me and Quinn while she was being taken away by some retard called Hondo. I don't really see a problem with Coby after having a few thoughts, after all, as long as he is not bothering me I couldn't care less and I don't see any reason as to why he should be bothering anyone else I know. If I see him again I will be sure to say hello...
Metallica - One
Slipknot - Pulse of the Maggots
Linkin Park - In the end
Metallica - Until it Sleeps
Metallica - Nothing Else Matters
Protect Myself Stay alive Control myself
Avoid People Avoid enemies and making them Adapt